Christmas Loot and Smiles to Boot!

We really need to do something about that 'Red-Eye' photo problem!

As you can see by her facial expression, Allyson displays great pathos as she gives piano recitals!

Merry Christmas!

We hope you and your'ns had a merry Christmas!


Our kids enjoyed Christmas exceedingly, but we parents were rather stressed out--not enough parents to go around to help all the kids figure out their stuff!

Keeping the Floyd family tradition alive.....

Last night I made something I haven't made in 11 years of married life---oyster stew! Of course, traditions have to be adjusted over time, and this was no exception:

--I used half cream and half milk instead of just skim milk.
--I used a whole 12-oz. container of large fresh oysters for 1.5 quarts of soup instead of just a couple little ones for 2 gallons.

After just smelling it, Cindy refused to even look at the big oysters half-submerged in the stew. She made some wisecrack about the smell, and not wanting to spew!
As I was eating it later, I asked the kids if they wanted to see a really big oyster. Cameron came over to see, then Makenna came over for a gander.
I could tell she was impressed with my hot and creamy soup, as she had plugged her nose before approaching!
Anyway, at least I thoroughly enjoyed it!

Our first and second Christmas miracles

Tonight it was my turn to take Erin shopping, specifically for athletic shoes and jeans.
After sifting through the jeans for 30 seconds, Erin decided she didn't need to buy jeans tonight.
That was the first miracle.

Miracle number two was when we found a pair of Womens Size 12-Wide Nike shoes in a style she liked and a price I could live with. The miraculous part is that these were the only shoes in the store in that size.

Lucky Ducky

Today Cameron came downstairs wearing the same clothes he has worn for the past two schooldays. (It is no surprise that it is his camouflage shirt and pants.)
When Cindy pointed out this oversight, and pleaded that he wear something else, he refused.
She came to find out that these were his "lucky clothes."
Lucky how?
"Well," he explained, “Yesterday I got 5 homeruns in kickball, and the day before I got three." (And yes, he has quite the inflated ego about his kickball prowess.)

Cindy jumped at this teaching moment, and related to him the story of the little girl who had a lucky duck, then lost the duck, and thereby found out that it wasn't the duck that made her lucky after all.

Needless to say, that dog didn't hunt.

"Nope," he replied, "I still like these clothes--they're lucky!"

And they may be even luckier than even he thinks, as they will pay out extra dividends come Saturday when it comes time for him to do his laundry, as he will only have to wash, dry, fold, and put away one shirt and one pair of pants (along with his action figure boxers and the 3 pairs of socks (the ones with green wording in the toe area) that he deigns to wear).

Of course, the above assumes that he can bend or otherwise contort the lucky clothes ('lucky stiff' clothes?) enough to get them into the washer.

Gizzards

Erin brought home a slew of books from the library yesterday, all with similar themes, such as Haunted Houses, Scary Stories for Sleepovers, and The Nightmare before Christmas (based on the overrated movie directed by perhaps the most overrated director in history).
As she started Haunted Houses, she came over to show me the photographs in this 'non-fiction' book that had images of ghosts, etc. I explained the wonders of PhotoShop and other photo enhancing software. Soon thereafter she came to me to say that the book had made her scared.
Doling out loving fatherly advice, 'Well, stop reading it then! Duh!!' I gently urged.
'But I've read the whole thing already!' she protested.
Needless to say, at bedtime and then again much later when Allyson woke her up during the night, she complained about being scared.
'Think happy thoughts!' I suggested. Having just gotten Allyson back to sleep by tickling her back in the middle of the night, it took me awhile to think of some actual happy thoughts for her to consider thinking.
I don't think she'll be reading the other books anytime soon....

We don't want to make anyone jealous, but....

unlike previous years, it is only one week from the big day, but this is where we stand.
1. All presents to extended family, etc., have been sent.
2. All presents to our family have been wrapped (except for a few 'undecided' items).
3. Our Christmas cards and family Christmas letters (both the English and Japanese versions) have all been sent.
4. Presents for teachers have all been prepared.

But lest you accuse us of boasting....
1. Our 'goody trays' are only half-baked. (Truth be told, our neighbors for some reason have developed some very high expectations. A couple years ago we just took some banana bread and oranges to a diabetic neighbor, and there was such moaning and gnashing of teeth (mostly by the diabetic) along with hints that they were really anticipating our next visit when we would be bringing the 'real stuff' that we spent the next week making over 10 different taste sensations.)

Hmmm....maybe that was boasting too....?

Chomper

Allyson's first tooth has finally come through this past week.

Matching the indentation on my finger with her gums, it is situated on her lower jaw, just right of center.

Dear Mr. Manners....

Dear Mr. Manners,

As Christmas approaches and I see the way my children are acting, is there something wrong about these feelings I keep having--that I really want to return all their expensive presents that I have spent so much time and effort on and replace them with some chunks of low-grade sub-bituminous coal?
I mean, I know it would be wrong to take even stronger steps. Besides, there are no local gypsy folk to sell them to anyway!
Sincerely,
Being Driven Up the Walls in Dayton

Hello Walls,
I have some good news and some bad news.
The bad news is that the malady with which you are afflicted is a common winter ailment. As an aside, the illustrious Polish psychologist Dr. Myse is the namesake of the clinical name of the ailment, namely 'Myse Lfishk Ids Syndrome.' And I regret to inform you that this is a chronic ailment that strikes without fail sometime between the Saturday after Thanksgiving and December 22rd, and will strike every year until your dear children move away.
Though there is no prescription available to combat this, please do not be too concerned, because there is good news.
By December 23rd, the magic that is Christmas and frantic rationalizing that there must have been SOMETHING good that the kids did during the year that justifies straining the family finances will combine to relieve all the symptoms.
Enjoy your Christmas!

Cherry cordially yours,
Mr. Manners

Like a rattlesnake!

Last night at 10 PM or so Makenna staggered into our room. She was only half-awake and obviously moody.

We put down our respective books and asked the usual questions....
'Did you have a bad dream?'
'nnnNNNN!' she snarled.
'Do you have to go to the bathroom?'
'nnnNNNNNNN!' she hissed.
'Would you like to get in bed with us?'
Silence, then a short nod.

She climbed in between us and we gently covered her with a blanket.
Ten seconds later she petulantly threw the blankets off, accompanied by additional snarls.
'Are you hot?'
'nnnNNNN!' she screeched.
'Would you like me to tickle your back?'
'nnnNNNN!!!' she shrieked.
By this reply we now knew that she had reached a new level of irritability.
'OK, then we'll just leave you alone.'
I turned back and continued reading King Lear.
Makenna snuggled up against me, draping an arm over me.
Cindy and I both began chuckling.
'nnnNNNN!!!' she bellowed.

However, she was soon squirming around again, lashing out at anything that displeased her, which was anything she saw, heard, or felt. After a couple minutes of this Cindy decided to shut it down.

'Makenna! Tell us what is wrong!'
'nnnNNNN!'
'Why are you wiggling so much? Does your bottom hurt?'
'nnnNNNN!'
'Makenna, if you won't tell us what is wrong, then you need to go get back in your bed!'
A pregnant pause.
Then...
'I have to go to the bathroom!' she moaned.
Cindy and I again made eye contact and tried to hide our spontaneous chortles.
After Makenna finished her job, all was well.

Especially as Makenna for once asked Cindy to go lay with her for awhile!

Christmas is coming, The goose is getting fat....

....That means we clean the frig out
To make more space for all that!

As you can see, we haven't cleaned out the frig recently, and I must say that the great variety of old dishes (also called 'petri dishes') was something to behold! Cindy says I am becoming more and more like her father every day!

Cindy probably also appreciates that I am throwing away some of the old mustard I have accumulated over the years. I am trying to make room for the prepared horseradish I asked Santa to bring me.

The Birthday Girl

As you can see, Cindy didn't have to slave over a bloated icing bag to prepare Erin's 10th year birthday 'cakes.' So in one sense it was more of a present for Cindy!

And we finally took Erin to 'Build-a-Bear' for her to build her own....MONKEY!
[Does not compute! Does not compute!]
She loved the experience and loves her bear, AKA 'Misty.' (Miserly fathers like me also get 'misty-eyed' by the time they walk out of this establishment. Others just cry outright!)
She also loved the fact that we took her out of school in the afternoon to do this (the lines during peak hours are unbelievable!)

When candy canes ATTACK!!

Cameron and Makenna love the 'colored' candy canes.

And it's not as if Cameron doesn't have enough weapons already!

Yet, yet again he finds a creative new way to employ his tongue to inflict wounds on others!!

Kenner was rather proud of her tongue too, shown below in all its glory!

Today the TV stand, tomorrow the Alps!

"What am I doing here? Nothing. Nothing at all.....

Why do you ask?"

Is her favorite show M*A*S*H?

Allyson has obviously been watching M*A*S*H reruns on the sly (which just goes to show just how precocious she is, as to do this would necessitate splicing into a cable signal from a neighbor, climbing out of her crib, going downstairs, and working the remote. Yet this is mere child's play for her!!)

The signs are obvious once you make the connection. We have since surmised the following:

• Klinger is her favorite character.
• She likes to gamble, and prefers to be the croupier.
• She has little respect for authority.
• She enjoys being around nurses.
• She has an affinity for men named Frank (actually I just made that one up!)

Which I guess is just another of saying that Allyson has the croup--she's very clingy, she seems to think that the more croupier she is the better, she doesn't listen when we plead for her to stay asleep, and she saw a doctor on Tuesday.

Monday and Tuesday nights Cindy got very little sleep, and I got more than her, but still not enough. Last night she slept all night, and we were able to catch up on some sleep, but she is still under the weather.

Her voice has deepened an octave, she is quite snot-nosed, and between her throat hurting and being stuffed up, she has a hard time staying asleep.

The Towering Inferno

Erin is playing on a 7~9 yr. old co-ed basketball team at the YMCA. It is made to be pretty non-competitive (which dovetails nicely with Erin's non-aggressive style of play).

Still, she does have quite a competitive advantage over the other kids.



--There just ain't to many 5'5" nine-year-olds out there!--

However, when she starts playing games in the 9~10 yr. old very-competitive girl league in January, she will definitely have to 'take it up a notch!'

Precious Moments.....'Shame, thy name is USELESS!'

Cameron has a lot of 'issues,' mainly of the variety that drive a parent nuts. And, knowing Cameron, that is likely the main reason he employs his different idiosyncratic behaviors.

Intelligent imp that he is, on some days he makes a chimp seem intelligent by comparison.

For example, though he knows how to say a perfectly good prayer without help, and he knows how to tie his shoes quite well, on many days he will feign utter incompetence and have a cute little tantrum as he vociferously demands help for these and other easy tasks.

Yesterday he had a friend over for most of the afternoon, and as we were getting all the kids together to go to Sam's Club, there was Cameron on the floor demanding that we tie his shoes.

Seeing his friend there, I tried to utilize peer pressure (i.e., shame him) to get him to tie his shoes. 'Cameron, I'll bet your friend ______ knows how to tie his shoes. Maybe he can show you!'

Cameron's hands didn't make even the slightest move towards his laces.

But his friend--one of the nicest kids you will ever meet--enthusiastically responded to my suggestion. He crouched down and kindly tied one of Cameron's shoes, doing each step slowly so that Cameron could learn it. As he finished, he said encouragingly, 'There! Now you try to tie the other shoe!' As Cameron slowly did each step (which he could do in his sleep if he had wanted to), his friend continuously lathered him with generous praise, and when Cameron had successfully completed the operation, gushed, 'You did great, Cameron!'

Cameron's friend surely did a good deed that day, and must've felt 10 feet tall.

As for us, as Cindy commented later, 'I wish we had gotten that on video! We could've had decades of laughs at Cameron's expense!'

A Blogworthy Exclusive! See it here first!

We took our family Christmas picture today, and this was the #2 pick, provided as an exclusive preview of upcoming attractive attractions to our loyal blog readers (all 1 of you??)



The #1 pick may soon be coming in the mail to you soon!

(Or, if I procrastinate writing the family letter, in an email on December 24th.)

And before we forget....

We went to Denna's house for Thanksgiving dinner (mmmm....dressing), and we had Erin wear my Napoleon Dynamite T-shirt with only one slight modification.

See if you can spot it!

Windy Wintry Wonderland

After a good 10 days of beautiful 60-degree weather, winter finally made a comeback.

Let's just say that this morning it was 54 degrees at 5:30 AM, and now at 10:20 PM it is 28 degrees and getting colder.

And windy! Over the course of the day the wind managed to nudge our 16-foot trampoline over 30 feet downwind! It's a good thing we have a fence and a small side hill, or the upstream neighbors would've thought Christmas had come early!

Another generation of 'A Christmas Story' watchers

Over the past 2 nights I have had some quality entertainment as the kids watched 'A Christmas Story.'

Sure, the movie was as great as ever, but the funnest part was watching the kids cackle at the different scenes.

I had the foresight to hit the mute button right after Ralphie intoned, 'A crummy commercial!?' after he deciphered the message "Be sure to drink your Ovaltine" using his Orphan Annie decoder ring.

The last thing I need is sweet Cameron (or even Makenna) running around calling things (and parents) SOBs!

Cameron was a curious monkey.....I mean BOY....

Cameron had to use our bathroom for his #2 tonight, and as he sat there with nothing better to do, he began gazing around and saw a box near the throne.

'Hey,' he yelled, 'What are these things in this box?'

Figuring out right away what he was looking at, I yelled back, 'They are girl things!'

He rejoindered, 'Yeah, but what are they?'

I shot back, 'You'll find out in about 7th grade!'

Cindy chimed in, 'Believe me, if I tried to explain it to you, you wouldn't want to know!'

'Hmmmfff!' was his only reply.

Silence reigned for a short while.

Then he called out again, with naked disgust in his voice, 'I'm reading the box but it doesn't explain anything! Here's a different box of the same stuff....it doesn't tell me anything either! Sheesh!'

In this case, curious minds don't need to know!

Cindy took a story book in for him to read instead.