Speaking of meds....

....Daddo is also taking some meds, and one of the side effects is having to 'see a man about a horse' more often (not to be confused with 'seeing a man about a dog' (i.e., #2)).

Cindy seems to get a kick out this, mostly because she revels in the fact that I am 'suffering' in much the same way she did during each of her pregnancies.

Who knows, maybe I'll start swelling at the ankles next! That would keep her laughing for weeks!

Like father, like son.....

Cindy bought a 6-pack of Coke tonight because Kenner had a migraine and the meds weren't doing their job (the caffeine supposedly helps relieve the pain).

Cameron saw these on the counter and asked who they were for.

Cindy told him, and then asked if he wanted any.

Just as I might have answered, though certainly more creatively, he replied, "It tastes worse than fried diarrhea on a stick!"

I heartily agree!

Homework party? I don't think so!

So what were you doing last night at 10:53 pm? Wanna know what was going on at my house?

Can you see how much fun they are having? What?

You can't?

That's because it was a nightmare!

Take 1 kid who doesn't like to put much effort into things that require thinking.

Add to that a test on the order of operations the next day and a F on the homework assigment to teach order of operations.

What does that add up to?

1 grumpy and tired 11 year old. 1 diligent, trick finding Daddy and 1 Mommy who gave up about 1 hour before and now can find the humor in it to take a photo!

Grandma's talents

To Kids: "Hey Kids, Grandma won a prize at a festival."

Cameron: "What for?"

Louis: "For a recipe."

Cameron: "Not for being clean???"





Our kids have learned what it means when Grandma comes to stay.

Louis Here: And much like in the video, she has been known to sing while she works!

When we were kids and we were bored, we would always here the same poem from Mom:

The hump, the hump, the camellious hump!
The hump that is black and blue,
From having to little to do!'

Mom won 3rd prize out of a field of 125 for her 'Mexican Platter' recipe at the Pullman, WA Lentil Festival. She also won $250, which should just about replenish her lentil supply!
This is the same recipe she used to delight starving Institute college students for a couple decades. You take a thick layer of hot rice (sticky rice, I think), then cover it with mashed lentils with taco seasoning, lettuce, tomatoes, and cheese, then cut it like a cake. Really, it was pretty good. However, I can't truthfully say the same about the lentil lasagna.....

Mothering lesson #1,997,364

When your child needs to be ready to catch the bus by 8:20 am and you know they are a "slow mover" don't continually get them up at 7:15 am thinking, "They will have plenty of time to get ready for school." You will have many mornings that end in fighting, crying and sad kids and moms as they barely make it to the bus.

Instead realize that if they are a "slow mover" then they should be allowed to move slowly. Try getting her up at 7:00 am instead and then you don't need to worry when she is just finishing her breakfast (cold cereal) at 7:47 am, after all she will have time to spare.

You will all have a much better day. Why didn't I learn this before today? Where was I when they passed out the manual?

Atta girl!

It has been a long time coming, but we are so pleased to announce that today Erin scored her first soccer goal in 5 (6?) seasons of playing (she took a sabbatical last year).

Although she prefers playing fullback or halfback, the coach (and asst. coaches) felt they needed her big kicking foot (bigger than mine, by the way) downfield, so the last 2 quarters she played on the front line (she played all 4 quarters).

In the 4th quarter another girl was taking it downfield on the side and Erin was going down the middle. The other girl passed it to her, she dribbled it down to about 4 feet from the goal (I think the goalie was somewhat intimidated (much like a rifle-carrying infantryman vs. a tank?)) and Erin then gave it a good boot.....at least, that is what she intended, but the ball was rolling a bit faster than she anticipated and instead she just barely grazed it, and the goalie--though getting a hand on it--let it get by her. In retrospect, it was a good thing, as the goalie was right in front of her and if it had gone in the air at all it would've likely ricocheted off the goalie and back out again.

Anyway, this means ice cream for everyone in the family tonight.

Oh, and Erin has been dog-tired the rest of the day! Cindy and I were tired just sitting there in the high-humidity high-80s weather.

Oh yes, the final score was 1-0, so she won the game for them too!

Oh, and the rec league basketball coaches are already salivating.....

Atta boy!

Tonight we had 3 soccer games to attend at 2 different venues, so I took Erin and Ally, and Cindy took Cam and Kenner.
Cindy called during Erin's game to tell me that Cameron had scored a goal. I later heard that what had happened went something like this: when the other goalie grabbed and then threw the ball it took a big bounce and Cameron was able to then kick the ball in midair, neatly putting it between the goalposts.
He was darn proud of his accomplishment!
To celebrate, I got Frostys for Erin and Ally on the way home (with only a short stop at Menards).

Something else I forgot to blog about regarding Cameron and soccer.....During the second week of practice, his coach ran them pretty hard, and by the time we got home and he had cooled down he was limping around like an old man, and he even used a heating pad on his calves all night! Cameron has always been in pretty good shape, but I think this humbled even him (at least a little bit!) There is also a kid on his team who is younger and can pretty much run forever at full-speed, and this has also kept him humble!

School Report

Well, I wasn't able to be home when the kids got home, but Cindy reported that they all seemed to have had a good time. They all have at least some kids from their respective soccer teams in their classes, and they liked riding the bus.

Erin said that everyone asked her the same 2 questions:
1. How tall are you?
2. How old are you?

And they're off!

Well 35 minutes ago my three oldest kids boarded a school bus to start their first day at a new school. The bus picks them up right in front of our house. They will be the last ones picked up and the first ones dropped off. I consider them to be very lucky.


We went to the open house last night to meet their teachers and find their classrooms. As far as first impressions go, they all seem to have good teachers. Cameron had to switch classes already. He is in the gifted program and they group all the advanced kids together. Well...there are 2 Cameron's in the 4th grade and the principal got them mixed up and put them in the wrong classes...Luckily we discovered the mix-up and got it straightened out during the open house. He is excited to be in the only portable unit (it even has air-conditioning.) His teacher is Mrs. Koenig. (Kay-nig)
Erin is extremely nervous. She came home last night really upset that she is going to a "really old school". She thinks she is not going to make any friends and that kids won't talk to her. She was doing better this morning. I don't blame her for being nervous though. I am nervous for her. Her teacher is Mrs. Reittinger (Write-in-jer)
Makenna on the other hand....I just hope she doesn't talk all day! She was bouncing off the walls last night. She is so excited. Her teacher is Mrs. Novellino. (Na-va-lean-o) She is young and seems great for a second grade.


They looked good this morning and I can't wait to hear about their day.
Erin, Makenna, Cameron, Seth (neighbor), Kyleigh (Seth's sister), Allyson.

Daddo Update: Regarding the "really old school," as Erin was griping about it during the open house, our neighbor (Seth's dad) told Erin that the school was over 100 years old. Trying to make her feel better and commiserate with her, I also chimed in, 'Yeah, Erin. That means that all of the kids that first went to this school are probably all dead now!' I'm not sure that made her feel any better, but at least I tried!

If this is due to global warming, BRING IT ON!

Augusts in Ohio are usually pretty unbearable--85~90 degree weather, high humidity, and warm muggy nights (i.e., the AC is left on 24/7).

Well, for the first time in the 10 years we have lived here, we are now in DAY 9 of some of the most delightful weather imaginable. It hasn't reached 85 on any of these days, the humidity has been negligible, the windows have been kept open 24/7, and the nights are cool and sometimes downright chilly!

For example, 2 nights ago we had a little s'more party at the neighbor's house, and we were hovering around the fire not to roast our marshmallows but to keep warm! I even put on some heavy jeans before going over, and never regretted it once! Yes, eating s'mores around a fire pit with a full moon filling the darkened sky is not to be missed!

Anyway, now that school will be starting (on Tuesday), this next week looks to be warmer and more humid, but Cindy just can't get this small smile off of her face, and it seems to be growing as the days pass. Her smile should be wrapped around the back of her head at approximately 8:45 on Tuesday morning!

Amish Ohio

Yesterday afternoon 3 of us manly men in our little neighborhood helped a 4th neighbor erect an 8x12 shed in their backyard.

As we were working away, I made the comment that we should have the womenfolk (who, along with a bevy of kids, were sitting in lawn chairs watching our masculine labors--actually, the ladies were just gabbing and sometimes gazing lazily in our direction between breaths) get us some dark wide-brimmed hats so that we could look like Amish at a barn-raising.

The shed owner then commented that while it was an idea with some merit, it would also mean we would have to forego our battery-powered drills.

We all chuckled, because we all knew that that dog wouldn't hunt, and returned to our labors. (I later found out that Cindy had said basically the same thing to the ladies.)

We finished with just enough light left to find the pizza and dessert (that the onlookers had gorged on long ago--especially Kenner, per the reports) and just enough light left for the mosquitoes to also begin feasting.

Did I ever mention that we love our neighborhood? There are so many good neighbors and a real sense of friendship and community in our little 11-home world.

Whispering sweet nothings.....

Holding Allyson as I cheered Kenner on during her first soccer game on Saturday (it ended up tied at 1-1), I felt a small pocket of air in my esophagus working its way up--a proto-burp, as it were.

Snuggling Allyson close to me, I nuzzled her ear and let loose.

For whatever reason (though I can't think of any offhand as of this writing), she was completely unphased.

I was quite deflated--either she had blithely ignored it or, even worse, it had lacked the punch to even register.

Then, in a moving gesture that almost brought tears of joy to my eye, she cocked her head to look at me, then turned her head around so that her other ear was near me, and exclaimed, 'Daddy! In my other ear! In other ear!'

Sadly, I had only had that one burp, so in this one case I couldn't fulfill her deepest wishes.

As a sidenote, in the past month or so Erin has mastered the skill of burping at will (a skill I was never able to develop, though not through lack of trying)--and this despite not having been around any of my brothers since last summer. (Of course, Uncle Wezzo has been relatively close (in DC) for a couple weeks, so perhaps there is some telepathy going on?)

Role Reversal

Yesterday after work I was in the kitchen with a hugely smiling and twitterpated Ally (she usually becomes that way when I walk in the door....), and as she twirled around she came to the fridge, where she stopped long enough to push the water dispenser, causing a little bit of water to run down the fridge/hit the floor.
It wasn’t a real big deal, so I just said in a rather gentle tone, ‘Ally, don’t do that.’

Her smiling visage instantly transmogrified into a eclectic mix of a self-condemning scowl, a tearful look, and a Mt. Vesuvius glower. (If she would have had a travel-size cat-o-nine-tails handy, she probably would’ve engaged in some self-flagellation!)

“I go to time out!’ she sobbingly declared.

‘Ally,’ I kindly imparted, ‘You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to go to time out.’

“YES I DO!” she retorted, and half-sobbing and half-glaring all the while, she ran into the den to her standard time-out corner.

....after slamming the den door shut a couple times....

As Cindy commented, Ally was acting like she was PMS-ing.

Speaking of speaking doggies....

As posted a time or two below, Allyson likes to bark like a dog (especially at zoo animals, etc.), and now she likes to act like one too!

FOR BEST RESULTS WHEN LISTENING TO THIS VIDEO:

1. SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS BLOG PAGE AND HIT THE STOP (PAUSE?) BUTTON ON THE MUSIC PLAYLIST.

2. TURN YOUR COMPUTER SPEAKER VOLUME UP.

Kudos to Erin's new camera and its (albeit primitive) video software!

Turnabout is fair play

Allyson dug deep into the diaper bag during sacrament meeting today and came up with a baggie of animal cracker cookies.

Eagle-eye Makenna, sitting on the other side of me, zeroed in on them and began begging Ally for a cookie.

Ever the gentle-hearted, Ally genially handed her one.

Makenna downed it head-first, and immediately waved at Ally and began pointing at her own widely-opened mouth in an animated fashion.

Obviously remembering some friendly sibling play last week, Allyson pulled out another cookie with her cute little fingers, eyed Kenner speculatively, then sang out, 'FETCH!' and threw it under the pew in front of us.

It is good that dogs are usually not present at church, as any Labrador Retriever would have suffered an acute case of inferiority if it had been able to see Kenner flawlessly execute a plunging lunge for the floor and come up with the cookie.

(Let me add that this was just about the same time the speaker (Pres. Heap) was talking about how good it was to have lots of kids.)

How sweet it is!

Vindication was never so scrumptious!

Chocolate pecan pie?
Pasty white in comparison.

A good ribeye?
Tasteless filth.

Kroger’s Private Selection Peanut Butter Swirl ice cream?
Unadulterated crapulence!

Yes, vindication is sweet.

Especially when it comes in the form of an unsolicited 3rd-party comment from a medical doctor.

You see, Cindy was trying out a new primary physician yesterday, and as she tells it, at one point during the interview the lady doctor paused, then asked,
“Is that your natural hair color?”
“Why, yes it is!”
“That’s just amazing! Your hair and eyes are....almost the exact same color!”
At which point........ (let me savor it!) ......Cindy ruefully replied, “Yes, well that is what my husband has always said!”

In my ecstatic reveling, I have decided to forgive Cindy for forgetting to mention that she has never agreed with my color diagnosis. For that matter, neither have the kids.

Yes, they ARE orange! Orange orange orange orange ORANGE!

I wish I knew how to dance a victory jig!


*(Cindy here:
My hair is red....Are my eyes red? I wouldn't call them so. Louis calls my eyes ORANGE...is my hair orange? I would plead NOT! What does that leave? Heck if I know.....whatever you call it, the doctor called them beautiful! I will go with her expert diagnosis.)

(Louis here: For the record, I fully agree with the doctor's diagnosis as to the beauty of her orange (OK, orange-ish) eyes!)

Check out his moves!

Check out my nephew, Ben, and a group of his friends. While at EFY they took place in a talent show. Ben....the center one....taught them all the dance. The girl taking the video apparently has a thing for him....as if you couldn't tell from all of her giggling. :)

Parental Mental Note #5028

Cindy called to tell me that she was getting ready to take the kids to a free showing of Shrek the Third at the full-price theater today (a summer reading program incentive).

In the background I could hear the dog throatily barking at her feet. (As we don’t have a real dog, this would be Allyson.)

As we were talking, Cindy made the comment that she would have to ‘Kick Kenner’s butt in gear’ to get her to get ready for the movie.

Cindy called back less than a minute later, saying, “I see that I’ve gotta be careful even around 2-year-old ears. Allyson has been repeatedly saying, ‘Kick Kenner’s butt!’ and ‘Gonna kick Kenner’s butt!’”

Speaking of cute kids....

I couldn't resist not posting this picture!



DISCLAIMER: Any resemblance between the sibling love and happiness displayed in this picture and what is usually on display between siblings in our home is purely coincidental--depending on the day, anyway.

The Most Holy Lord Obama the Most Merciful Messiah....Oops, I mean Erin!

As you can see, Obama isn’t the only one sporting a self-fashioned halo nowadays. (Of course she hasn’t talked about how her mere presence will make the ocean levels fall, heal the planet, and lead to all sorts of other yet-to-be-specified ‘changes’ that all our 57 states have been waiting for, but I’m sure it’s only a matter of time!)

Yes, Erin the Most Merciful does enjoy using and using and using and using her camera. She loves to take pictures of herself, nature, TV shows, more TV shows, and most anything else that may or may not catch her eye.

May her blessed name be praised for 100GB hard drives!

She goes through batteries like crazy, but since she isn’t paying for them with her own money she doesn’t seem to mind the expense. (Hmmm, that reminds me of our beloved Congress for some reason....)

The Curse is Alive and Well

Cameron blew like the wind during the exciting Cub Scout Regatta, but just as in the case of the Pinewood Derby, top honors were not to be.



He was actually astoundingly prophetic. Before the races he informed me (with no regrets, wistfulness, nor any trace of sorrow—it was actually more of a kind of perverse pride), “I won’t come in first--I always come in second!”

And he proceeded to do just that!



Atta boy!

Horse Sense (and Scents....)

On Monday the kids got a taste of their heritage—some real horse-riding! And they liked it so much they did it twice! (Or maybe three times—I had to leave early for a dumb videoconference with Japan.)





Allyson wouldn't get within 3 feet of one. She made me hold her and if I approached a horse she scrambled over my shoulder in the opposite direction like a cockroach from roach spray, and spouted some nonsense about 'No! No horsey! No! No!'

Erin now says she wants to own a ranch when she grows up and have lots of horses. Kenner wants a horse. Cameron just smiles quietly to himself.

Our own Paris Hilton...

....with better looks, wider shoulder straps, less creepiness, more brains, less cosmetic surgery, and less money....

(Hat-tip to the Drudge Report for the Paris photo.)