Floyd Shuttle Service....

Today was a day we have been anxiously awaiting. Erin wanted to stay home alone while Cindy took Makenna and Cameron to swim lessons!

And she did!!

And on a related note, tonight we had to shuttle the 3 kids between their soccer practices at 3 different fields at staggered times. My task involved taking Cameron, then leaving him at practice to drop off Erin, and then leave her at practice to return to pick up Cameron and then return to pick up Erin. Cindy was in charge of taking Makenna and watching the babe.

Fortunately, Makenna's team was still having practice at Cameron's field, so though I did the above I didn't have to take Cameron back with me when I picked up Erin.

Yes, we have holes in our heads.....

Mere trifles

Cindy has been experimenting with the traditional 'trifle' dessert.

Traditional trifle consists of repeated layers of angel food cake, Cool Whip, vanilla pudding, and pieces of fruits of your choice in a big glass bowl. It is a light and refreshing dessert.

However, the latest Taste of Home magazine had a recipe that caught the attention of both Cindy and me as we flipped through it--"Chocolate Trifle." It consisted of repeated layers of choco cake, Cool Whip, chocolate pudding, and crushed toffee.

We had a chance to try it out 2 weeks ago, and to 'take it up a notch' we did half cake and half brownies. The brownies were supremo, but both Cindy and I felt that it was still missing a little 'kick,' so it was back to the laboratory (i.e., www.Allrecipes. com).

It was there that Cindy found an idea for choco-peanut butter trifle. So she used just brownies, choco-PB pudding made using sweetened condensed milk and Cool Whip, and plain Cool Whip topped with chopped-up PB cups.

This sounded like the perfect combination, but when we ate it we discovered that it had a bit too much punch--Erin said it was too rich, Cameron said it was too 'creamy,' and Makenna only ate a little bit of it. I concurred with Erin, and even Cindy admitted it was a bit too rich.

So, though it pains me to relate this, I thoroughly chastised Cindy and told her that she needed to do better! And additionally, that no matter how many times it took that she had to keep at it until she got it just right!

We'll keep you updated!

Further excursions into language

Cindy has taught Makenna a new--and extremely useful--word.
It is 'ginormous.' As in, 'I want a ginormous helping of dessert!'

As an avid student of the English language, Iwas not too pleased at this linguistic hedonism. Now she will stop using the word I had previously taught her for 'big.'

That would be "Hugeymongous."

The gluteus maximus of gullibility?

Last night Cameron was complaining that his leg was hurting, so Cindy adroitly said, 'Maybe it's a sugar cramp--that's what you get when you eat too many treats!'
The poor kid took her seriously.
So tonight when his leg (more precisely, where his leg and rear join) hurt, he confusedly exclaimed, 'Mom, my leg hurts even though I didn't eat a lot of sweets today!'

Cindy has asked that I not disabuse him of this misconception.

As a sidenote, when he showed me his hurt spot, I took it as a teaching opportunity:
'Cameron, that is your gluteus maximus muscle. "Gluteus" means "Butt," and "Maximus" means "big." Everyone has them. Ergo, everyone has big butts! Butt muscles, that is...."
He was suitably impressed with my command of English language history.
I can easily visualize him walking up to some cute little girl and saying, "Hey cutie, nice big butt!.....I mean, big butt muscles!"

Erin on her innuendo-finding toes....

Tonight Cindy and I played a nice game of Phase 10. Cameron was my partner and Erin was Cindy's partner, but though they enjoyed the game and learned the basics, it ended up where whenever Cindy or I would get a Phase that we would then get the kid's attention and have them put them down.
Anyway, both of the kids were passing the time by taking the Phase 10 list cards and inserting them between the leaves in the table. We told them to stop, and I mentioned that there was a lot of food particles in there.
At this point Cindy chimed in with what we now know to be ill-considered--albeit innocent--choice of words:, 'Yeah, there's a lot of crap in those cracks.'
About a second later, Erin got a big grin and exclaimed, 'Mom! Do you mean there is a lot of crap in our cracks?' and pointed to her butt-cheeks. Cameron then got on the bandwagon--he stood up on the chair and pointed his scrawny butt towards us, and while pointing at it, chanted, 'There's crap in my crack!' a number of times.
Genteel we are not.

PS: Cameron and I won.

PPS: Handily.

Pyromania 201

Cameron, like many boys his age, is seven.

Additionally, he loves to play with fire.

Every time I fire up the grill he magically appears by my side, trying to throw in leaves and other yard waste for me to roast.
Additionally, he loves to spray out the big flames that erupt on said grill (because the flames flare up even more before they go out).
He even loves to light candles, throwing in the unburned ends of matches to make it more spectacular.
His dream of dreams is to have a big bag of fireworks and a box of matches, with no parents nearby.

Well, today he accidentally found another way to start a fire. He put a Wendy’s cheeseburger in the microwave to warm it up, but it still had the foil wrapper on it. Fortunately Cindy was nearby when the sparking began, but the wrapper was on fire when she pulled it out.

I am sure that this knowledge has given him pause for thought.

I can see the wheels turning right now!

Cute baby contest photo winner!?

Here is Allyson at her cutest, which, we must admit, is pretty darn cute!

A little mishap....

At 6:10 PM, Kenner stepped on a small piece of glass on the floor which cut into her heel and got lodged under the skin. She began screaming and there was a fair amount of blood, so I took care of the bleeding first. She finally calmed down but she wouldn't let me dig around for the glass, so we ended up taking her to the local Urgent Care facility for the extraction.

Just to let you know how alert she was between her sobs, as I picked her up to carry her to the van she was already sobbingly calling out the seat next to Allyson--she was obviously leveraging her wounded status for as much gain as possible!

2 hours later it was out and she was fine. (She didn't like the novocaine shot, though!) For being such a good trooper, I told her we would get her some 'yucky ice cream.' She shot back, 'I don't want yucky ice cream! I want yummy ice cream!'

I blame Dora the Explorer...

I have invented a new Spanish phrase, mostly by accident, of course. It just sort of popped out.
Still, it is useful, and I could see it becoming a handy phrase in many otherwise awkward adult situations.
For example, if asked the following, I would tend to find this new phrase especially apt:

1. So, how would you like to watch the kids for a couple hours tonight?
2. Would you like a nice big helping of cherry pie?
3. Hey buddy, can you spare 50 cents for coffee?

In each and every instance, this phrase works wonderfully.

The first word (particle?) is the masculine 'El.' The second is the simple negative 'No.'

Say it out loud--but not necessarily around the kids....you'll like it!?

UPDATE: It could also perhaps be considered Cockney?

Guppies

Today was a momentous day for Cameron--it was his first swimming lesson. Both he and Makenna are in the same class at the Y, and thankfully they both enjoyed it thoroughly!
Their instructor was a girl, so I guess that she wasn't as handsome to Makenna as Uncle Ryan is in her eyes!

At lunchtime I joined the 3 older kids for an hour at the pool, and Cameron was showing me how he could swim underwater for about 15 feet (which is really good considering he uses one hand to both keep his nose plugged and scrunch up his mouth to keep any water out!), and swim on his back 15 yards or so.

Makenna was also swimming on her back wonderfully and quite ably on her dog paddle, and except for the time when Erin dunked her had a great time!

That's the spirit!

Erin was being a bit balky tonight about clearing the table, and as she sat in a chair obviously luxuriating in a pity party of one, from the other room Cameron sang out, 'Erin, keep the sunny side on your face, Erin! Keep the sunny side on your face!'
It didn't help nearly as much as setting the timer for 5 minutes and informing Erin that she either did it now or she would be doing it--along with one of the other kitchen cleanup jobs--for a whole week!
And no, I have no faith that this will be any more efficacious if used when Cameron is having one of his tantrums.

No faith at all.....

Like some marriages????

The past 2 nights Erin has slept with Makenna in Kenner's queen-size bed with nary a problem. Both girls fell asleep quickly and slept soundly.
Tonight, however, it was Cameron's night to sleep in her bed, and it unfolded like many a sad marriage tale. I'll let you figure out the parallels!

First they fluffed their pillows and situated themselves. They then both agreed that it was hot and they needed the ceiling fan on. A couple minutes later they were cold and they turned it down to low.
Next, Cameron rolled over to her and said, 'Makenna--let's snuggle!' They hugged each other platonically for a couple seconds, then Cameron said, 'Snuggling makes me hot!' and rolled away. Makenna echoed his sentiments.

The honeymoon was definitely over.

Cameron then asked for his boombox to listen to his usual 'Scripture Scouts' CD. After positioning this in the empty crib, they both settled down again.
50 minutes later I went upstairs and found them arguing--Cameron was complaining that she was stealing all the covers and was lunging in for the attack. I pulled him away and at my urging he gladly picked up his pillows and marched into his own room as Makenna cried disconsolately into her pillows.

Cameron was asleep in less than 4 minutes, but Makenna calmed down only after I tickled her back and told her how proud I was of her swimming! As usual, when I tried to give her a goodnight kiss she violently turned her head away and said, 'No kisses tonight!'

One from the Mommo.....The smell of mutiny!

We had planned on going to a park Thursday that has water fountains for the kids to run through. We have been there before and the kids had a great time. Well...we had some problems (talking back, sassiness, disrespect, etc etc.) that morning and ended up not going. Instead the kids worked all day long. No computer, No TV, no friends. It was great! At one point Erin kept asking me, "After I do THIS will I be done?" When I told her no she ranted and went up to Cameron's room. Makenna came down a few minutes later and I asked what the kids were doing, "They are in Cameron's room talking about how to tell you NO!" I had a good laugh about that.

Impending doom.....

Allyson has now gone 5 days without a poopie diaper. Her potent fluffs just about knock you over! However, it doesn't seem to be causing her too much discomfort, so we will give her a couple more days.

Personally, I think that midday tomorrow would be just about right, so Cindy can call me at work and tell me all about it!

Applied CTR

Friday night Erin was invited to a sleepover, and an hour later Cindy got a call from the mother--she had rented a PG13 movie for the girls to watch, then Erin had asked her what the rating was, and hearing it was PG13 she told them that she wasn't allowed to watch movies with that rating.
I guess they ended up watching something on the Disney channel instead.
Yes, we are proud of Erin for standing firm for what she has been taught!
(I guess we need to caution parents beforehand now!)

'Cussing' ABC's, with some D's, F's, and S's to boot!

Our kids excel at many things, but their true genius lies in their exceedingly fine tattle-telling.

A month or two ago Erin ran in and breathlessly announced, 'Cameron said the F-word!' Cindy started hyperventilating until she realized that he had said 'freakin'' as in 'freakin' idiot.' Still not a good word, mind you, but much less traumatic to a parent.

So for the benefit of those of you who may visit our family some day, I am providing a quick reference guide of taboo words.

The 'S-Word': Stupid
The 'D-Word': Dummy
The 'R-Word': Retard
The 'P-Word': Cameron's favorite word when in the height of anger, it is the anatomically correct word for an inculator, ding-a-ling, or whatever other euphemism you might care to use.

I am sure that this list will have future additions.....

Jungle survival, etc.

Last night it was my turn to read to Cameron, and he picked a book about animals. One of the pages was about jungle birds, like parrots and toucans. The text told about how parrots use their beaks to break nuts open, and how the toucan's beak is made out of the same material as our fingernails. Cameron commented that such a beak must not be very strong because he could bend his own fingernails, but I corrected him and said it was probably a lot thicker and thus a lot stronger.
'So,' he effortlessly extrapolated, 'If we were in a jungle we could cut off the head of a toucan to crack nuts to eat!'
I digested this for a second, then kindly reminded him we had hands and could therefore use rocks to open nuts.
He seemed a bit disappointed.

Fishing, Part III

So, about the time we were leaving, Cameron casually asked, 'So Dad, how many did you catch?'

You know, there's nothing worse than going fishing with a kid who can both count and has a mind like a steel trap. (In Cameron's case the trap teeth are also tipped with curare poison.)

For example, I again regaled him with the story about the time I caught a bunch of crappie off a dock on the Snake River. 'I must've caught 30!' I reminisced.
'Last time you said you must've caught 15 that time. and by the way, I believe that you caught them using a red and white jig.'
'15, 30, what's the difference--there were a lot of fish!'

Still, there are some advantages to having a child angler that is counting age. Cameron baits his own hook, and most of the time he can unhook the fish too, which means that I can spend more time fishing!

And by the way, it was one. A medium-sized bass. Don't worry about remembering this, as Cameron will definitely be able to remind you!

Fishing, Part II

On Saturday morning (8-5-06), I woke up Cameron at 7:20 and we got ready and went out for some early fishing at the company pond. Though Cameron is a wonderful caster, he prefers to fish right along shore and catch the bluegills using hotdogs for bait. He caught a couple bluegills, then about 20 minutes later I heard a big shout and turned to find him fighting with a bigger fish, and I helped him pull out a 1 lb+ largemouth.
In the next 10 minutes he repeated this trick 3 more times. I know for a fact that #3 and #4 were the same fish, and I highly suspect that all of the first 4 were in actuality just one dumb, nay, imbecilic bass who couldn't stand to see bluegills getting a nice hotdog appetizer.
During the next hour he caught 2 more bass along with a number of bluegill (some of which he snagged with a bare hook), and he also had his line cut twice by what was either a large carp or catfish (there are a couple 3~4 ft carp in the pond).
We fished for over 2 hours, with Cameron going through an entire pack of hotdogs before he was ready to leave.
A nice father-son experience!

Fishing, Part I

At the company cookout a week ago Friday, they had the usual fishing contest. I made about 4 casts and came up with a nice 2.5 lb largemouth that was 17.25 inches. It was in first place up until the last couple minutes, when one of the bait-using ladies caught a catfish that was 23 inches. Length is the only judgment criteria, so once again the crown was stolen!
Now, I told you this before I go on to the next entry.......