10,000 BC

We do try our darndest.

And even if you don't happen to fully agree with the quote

Every generation, Western civilization is invaded by barbarians — we call them “children”

(and yes, it does depend on the day, AND on the child in question), sometimes being a parent can be downright depressing.

For example, if we were to faithfully chronicle our daily family life on this blog, it could lead to great disillusionment, possible ostracism, and not be nearly so attractive to read. (I would envision the site being blacklisted.)

That is why we tend to focus on the bright spots--few as they may sometimes be--in our lives of quiet (or was that 'cacophonous'?) desperation.

Take Ally for example. We have taught her to drink from a cup, to brush her teeth (she loves the adult-strength Crest with Scope), and to otherwise walk and talk (albeit in a limited fashion) like a regular lady.

Tonight I loaded up her toothbrush, set her on the vanity, turned on the water, and let her do her stuff. Then I turned away for a second, and when I turned back I saw THIS:



Postnote: When I showed Cindy the picture she said, 'Oh yes, she has been doing that for a day or so--she saw Cameron doing it yesterday.'

We shoulda known!

I don't think this quite qualifies as bragging.....

So, as I pull into the driveway Cameron comes over to my open window (it's over 60 degrees and sunshiny) and in a fairly conversational tone informs me of the following:

"Book 4 of Harry Potter: Page 117. My butt itches. Oooh, my _____ itches!" then prances away to do that voodoo that he do.

Baby butt cream, Cameron?

Cameron, who every day reminds me more and more of charming Little Willie* from poetry memorized during my childhood, now has a new phrase that he just loves to share.

Namely, 'My butt itches.'

The delivery is not one of a child with a sear in his rear. No, it is more like a casual conversation starter.

If you were a fly on the Floyd family wall, the conversation you hear might go something like this:

Cindy: Cameron, have you brushed your teeth for school yet?

Cam: Makenna sucks! [Then, repeatedly slapping his protruding bony butt for emphasis...] My butt itches.

Cindy: [Sigh.] Don't talk like that, just go brush your teeth Cameron.

Cam: MybuttitchesMybuttitches!

Cindy: Oh, do you need the baby butt cream?

Cam: Shut up! My butt itches!

At this point you would be begging for a flyswatter.....

DISCLAIMER: Please do not be alarmed or send us your favorite home remedy, for there is no true butt itch. Cameron has just found a new phrase to annoy the family. Actually, he has a massive quiver of phrases at his command that he lets fly, but this is the only one suitable for posting. For example, there is now another 'thing' he says that itches him greatly, but this is a family blog and thus will not be aired.

*A sampling of Little Willie poetry at its finest:
1. Willie, whose ideas are swell,
Threw his sister in the well.
Mother couldn't find her daughter,
Now we sterilize our water.

2. Willie saw some dynamite,
Couldn't understand it quite;
Curiosity never pays.
It rained Willie seven days.

Et tu, basketball?

Because of the big snow on Friday and Saturday, Erin's Saturday basketball tournament was postponed.

Naturally, with the high percentage of church-going folks in Ohio, the league triumvirate conveniently rescheduled the games for Sunday morning.

Our kids are pretty good sports about activities that fall on a Sunday. All three of the older ones have missed a veritable cornucopia of birthday parties and sports team parties, and they don't even get upset about it anymore.

(Actually, they often get more upset about having to go to church than not being able to go to parties. And conversely, Cindy and I end up being more upset with them at church than we probably would've been with them at home. Such is life....)

So anyway, she missed the game, the team lost by 2, and we later found out that this was a single-elimination tourney, so now the season is over.

Erin was less than crushed. She smiled sweetly, and confirmed, 'The season is over?'
She then continued, 'That means you are taking me to the mall to get my ears pierced! Would this Saturday work for you? It works for me!'

Erin did have a good year. She had an excellent coach (i.e., a knowledgeable but laid-back coach who placed higher priority on letting all the girls get to play than in just winning), and she became more aggressive (if anything Erin does outside of attacking Cindy's delicious desserts could be called aggressive) in pulling down rebounds and also got better at finding the open gal and making good passes to them. Though probably 8 inches taller than any other girl in the league, a ball hog she was not. But she usually managed to score 4~10 points a game, and by the end of the season was pulling down 10 or more rebounds a game.

Pottering around....

Well, it has now officially been 12 days since Cameron began reading the first Harry Potter book.

This evening I had to take him to the library to return Book 3 and check out Book 4.

He also checked out Book 5 just in case he finished Book 4 too quickly.

It is obvious that he reads as fast as he retorts!

(But we like him a lot better when he is reading.)

UPDATE: As Cameron and I were driving to the YMCA on Tuesday, he modestly theorized that there was no one else in his class who could even read a Harry Potter book. Always analytical, he went on, 'Take Xxxx for example. Books can only be renewed once and so there is no way he could finish it in that length of time.'

Live and learn

As some of you may have noticed, Cindy and I have added links to our 'Bookshelf' to our Favorite Links site.

Clicking on the links will take you to pages that show our favorite books.

Tonight Cindy wanted to upload a picture of herself for this other site, but she couldn't decide on one.

She then decided to go upstairs.

I was thus left to my own devices.

The rest is history!

Just call her 'Pippi.'

UPDATE: Naturally, I put a humorous picture on my Bookshelf too!

UPDATE 2: Cindy already did a switcheroo! I am just glad in my heart of hearts that she doesn't know my Bookshelf password!

Akin to 'Pronoun Trouble'?

Allyson has become an Internet addict. One day I had the terrible idea of showing her pictures of cute doggies on the Internet. This was fine for awhile, but soon it didn't soothe her cravings, so we progressed to harder substances----elephants, peacocks, and her new favorite, snakes!

So, whenever I am at the computer she runs over, climbs up the desk, deposits her cute little bum in my lap, and says, 'Snake!' or 'Chocklit doggie! (chocolate labradors)' etc.

It's really irritating.

So if any of you have little kids, give it a try! This is our favorite site (click on 'Galleries' for different animals).

Anyhoo, being so young, her pronunciation is less than perfect. A perfect example of this is heard when she sees a fox. She knows what it is by sight, and can say the word, but her little tongue has 'issues.' You see, she gets the 'f' just fine, but the 'o' sounds more like a 'u', and her 'x' sounds like a hard 'k'.

You do the math!

She's plumb salty in her talkin'!

It finally comes out....

Erin, like most girls her age, is 11. Also like most girls her age, she doesn't like math.

In fact, if you were to ask her, she would likely say something like, 'I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT THEY WANT ME TO DO! THE TEACHER ONLY EXPLAINED IT FOR 5 MINUTES AND THEN EXPECTS US TO DO IT! I HATE MATH! MATH SUCKS!'

Naturally, this week she was invited to join the math club.

And she accepted!

You see, Erin does fine in math. With just one small caveat. Namely, she is good at math when she turns on her brain. Sadly, this is a rare thing when she is in 'homework mode.' When doing her homework, she would much rather have us explain it to her using the actual problem (this is also known as 'trying to con your parents into doing your homework for you'). We seldom acquiesce.

So anyway, getting to the point of this post, as you may have noticed Cindy has made a lot of changes and enhancements to our blog. Sadly, during this process she lost a lot of the elements and had to redo them from scratch, and then I had to play with the html code to keep the elements she had redone from scratch.

Then she found out that the links to her friends' sites weren't working. I found the problem and got them up and running. With fecund tears of gratitude (which she stoically kept in check just inside her tear ducts), she said, 'You know, I guess she gets it from me....' Puzzling over this enigmatic statement, I asked, 'Uhhh, whaddya mean?'

She replied, 'I guess Erin gets it from me. When there are problems like I had with the blog today, I would rather just have someone fix it for me rather than try to figure it out myself!'

OK--they got it right this time....

Well, for once out of 5 times, the local weathermen got it mostly right! (At only 20% accuracy, could it be that they are recent transferees from the Seattle area?)

And for the first time in our 10 years here, we even had a BLIZZARD WARNING! Alas, except for a couple gusts in some areas overnight, the wind never really reached the requisite 30 mph.



Anyway, the snow blower got some heavy usage this morning, and we probably have 10 inches on the ground, with 2~3 foot drifts in places.

UPDATE: Oops, Cindy was logged in when I posted this.... so it is under Mommo!

4th Time's the charm?

Well, the local weathermen are forecasting 6~10 inches of snow starting tomorrow morning thru Saturday morning.

I can hardly wait for the 'Winter Storm Advisory' to change to a frightening WINTER STORM WARNING!

Hmmm.....the last three times this happened, we got a lot of....what is it called?....Oh yes, RAIN!

And the one time there wasn't a grand WARNING announced in solemn tones with great fanfare? Oh yes, 5 inches of snow!

PS: Cameron's mind started running in high gear when I told him how much snow we might get. I am hoping it is only visions of sledding and snowmen rather than visions of walloping his sisters with snowballs.

Mmmmmmm.....Cod!

Who would have thought when we sat down for dinner last night that Allyson would be the last one at the table. Usually she is done eating before everyone has food on their plate, but tonight she was an eating machine--she never paused as she shoveled in morsel after morsel. Apparently we hit upon a winner. Breaded cod with LOTS of tartar sauce--as a matter of fact, she ate her first serving of tartar sauce before she ever got any fish! I have given her fish once before and she chowed down on it then too. Louis suggested that we should try feeding her sushi next!

[UPDATE from Louis] Mmmm....sushi!

Harry Potter read-a-thon

Christmas of 2006 brought to our family the first 4 Harry Potter movies. We had never let the kids watch them, neither had they read any of the books. Needless to say, over the course of time since then they have watched and re-watched the movies many times--including the latest one that was added to our collection this past Christmas.
This past Christmas Cameron asked for the Harry Potter Scene It DVD game. It has been played so many times you would think every possible question would have been seen....but new ones still keep popping up. Cameron is typically the winner, and he is not shy about letting the world know--especially the world of losers!
Last Saturday he insisted we get Book 1 from the library. (We actually have all books but they are in our storage unit until we move.) Louis took him and got the only copy of Book 1 they had. Cameron dived in, and over the next 2 days he gave us constant updates as to what page he was on. Monday evening just before FHE he made the big announcement that he had completed it-- 300ish pages in 2 1/2 days. (This is from a kids who "hates" chapter books.) NOTE: Which is not to say that he doesn't like to read--he devours non-fiction books about sharks, snakes, other creepy-crawlies, and science in general.)
Tuesday morning before leaving for school I was given the charge to get Book 2 and 3 from the library. I took the only copies at the library, and as of last night (Wednesday) he was halfway through Book 2.
We certainly enjoy the quiet (and peace) during his reading spells!

I smell a rat....

About 2 months ago Cindy finally made it to the top of the reserve list at the library and got a copy of the Disney/Pixar movie Ratatouille.

We all watched it a time or two over the course of a couple weeks--it was a thoroughly enjoyable morsel--and then returned it.

Then about 2 weeks ago, Allyson began saying 'Tooey! Tooey!'

What could this possibly mean?

Growing disgusted with our lack of comprehension, she added another word to her vocabulary.

'Watch.'

But instead of 'Watch Barbie!' Or 'Watch Emmo [Nemo]' she said 'Watch Tooie!'

When asked, 'Do you mean Ratatouille?' she replied with her trademark 'A-huh!' followed with her usual heart-melting grin.

We put her off for a week, but she kept at it, so on Saturday Cindy called a friend and luckily they had it. Allyson has now watched it another 6 times or so and is quite content.

SLAM! Slam!Slam!Slam!Slam!Slam!

So, tonight I drove Erin to a friend's house to deliver a blank copy of a homework assignment, and when we got home and walked in the door, I made the offhand comment to no one in particular, 'There's my good deed of the day!'

I then soliloquied further, 'As a matter of fact, that's about the 10th good deed of the day.'

Cindy, with respect radiating from her tiger eyes, adoringly asked, 'Yuh-huh. And the other ones were???'

I began enumerating the many acts of kindness I had done at work, at home that afternoon, and crescendo-ing my way through to the evening, easily making it to ten.

'See,' I modestly trumpeted , 'I did do a lot of good deeds today!'

'Ahhhh,' Cindy evenly replied, 'So you're saying you've been acting like a mother today.'

A blessing in disguise

Allyson was sitting next to Louis watching a Barbie movie (what else would she be watching?). When I came into the room Louis moved a pillow that was next to Allyson so I could sit down. Almost immediately upon sitting next to her with Louis on the other side she looks up at me and says rather forcefully, "Moov, Moov." In other words " MOVE IT RIGHT NOW! YOU ARE NOT INVITED TO THIS DADDY-DAUGHTER PARTY! YOU ARE NOT WANTED! GO AWAY!"

I said to Louis, "Where does this come from and why is it directed at mom? After all, I am the one who nursed this child for over 12 months, have wiped her rear end more times than I can count, spent endless hours rocking and holding her, take care of her day in and day out, bathe her, launder her clothes, prepare food for her, entertain her, etc., etc. So why at mom?"

Refusing to give into her selfish desires I stayed put. I'll show her I thought--it's wet willy time (without the wet...only the willy). Surprised to find a finger tickling her ear she jerked away with a loud "OUCH!"

I said to her (and indirectly to Louis), 'Ouch? Ouch? If you want to know what an ouch is, I've got a 6-inch scar across my mid-section from giving birth to you and you won't even let me sit by you.'
The thanks I get.....

Oh well. On the bright side....Daddy is now the favorite. Let Daddy hold her, take care of her, change her diaper, put her to bed, feed her, etc., etc.

Some things can be a blessing in disguise.

History Lessons

With Grandma in town, we made a family trek last Saturday to Greenville, Ohio to see the Annie Oakley historical sites.

Annie was the shooten-est tooten-est gal that ever shot a handgun or rifle. Born and raised in Greenville, she became famous throughout the US in the late 1800s and early 1900s for her extraordinary shooting ability (while still young she made money by shooting birds for local markets, and the birds she killed were in high demand because she would invariably kill them with head-shots and thus not damage the meat). She spent many years touring with the Wild West Show as one of its main attractions, including touring with the show in Europe, where she met Queen Victoria and other royalty.

Part of the reason we chose this trip is because Erin just completed a book report of one of her biographies. (She had to draw a picture for the cover of her report, and since nowadays are nowadays, she couldn't draw even a picture of a gun (that would get her suspended or kicked out of school), so she just drew her face--or a reasonable facsimile thereof....)

Annie is there to greet you as you drive through Greenville:




She is standing there beside you at the Annie Oakley exhibit at the Garst Museum:



And her final resting place is about 8 miles north of town (the map and written directions from the museum don't help much!):



On the way home we drove through a town (a wide spot in the road) called Ludlow Falls and we were even able to find the Niagara-esque falls!



Thus endeth the history lesson.

Icicle Imp

'Nuf said!

Sledding in the backyard....

This morning the kids went out back to sled on our hill, and Allyson wanted to go out too so we bundled her up and then I took her for her first ride down the hill.

As you can see, she really enjoyed it--especially the snow that flew up in her face!



Now we can say that all of the kids have sledded on it!



It was worth the tears! (I thought so anyway!)

Oohhh....I feel giddy!!!!!

It's so electrifying I can't stand it!

Hillary Clinton will be less than 1 mile away from our home today on a campaign stop at the local high school!

As a precaution, I am putting X's of tape on the windows just in case her shrillness breaks the glass (this is an old WWII trick to keep windows from shattering completely).

Fortunately, this patron-saint-of-governmental-control-of-as-much-of-your-life-as-possible has become somewhat muted in recent weeks....

And Obama, who says less in 45 minutes than even Dubya, will be in the area on Monday!

Catch me before I swoon! [Insert heavy sarcasm here.]

Then again, McCain was in the area on Wednesday, and I can't say that he really thrilled me either.....

The prognosis is not good....

Speaking of snow, the local weathermen have done a stellar job this year of prognostication.

In the past month we have had two 'WINTER STORM WARNINGS' and both have turned to rain before they hit our latitudes. I had to drive to Columbus to pick up the Mother at the airport on one of these WARNING days, and instead of the forecasted snow and ice, there was just a steady rain.

Then on Tuesday night the weathermen said, "Oh, maybe a dusting up to an inch or two overnight" and, naturally, the next morning we woke up to four inches and more coming down (we ended up with six).

And don't get Cindy started about the school superintendant that only tends to cancel school for one of two reasons:
1--The above-mentioned weathermen merely FORECAST a winter storm.
2--There is more than 1/16th of an inch of snow on a given morning and/or the weathermen are forecasting that it could possibly turn to worse weather during the day. (I.e., as happened yesterday.)

Anyway, the kids only spent 2 days at school this week.

If you want to get into a LONG conversation, just ask Cindy how her week was!