Straps, Smacks, and Racks

A number of months ago, Cindy put up a homemade shelf in Cameron's room. The intent was to give him a place to put more of his stuff so that his floor would stay clear. (As Cameron would say, 'That idea was an epic fail!' but her heart was in the right place.

This past week Cameron paid for a new gun (a handsome .22 air rifle (though with no compass in the stock...)) and so I took advantage of his shelf to fashion some stylish slings for it, using an old belt and some 80-lb test string, as can be seen below:

Once Cindy espied it, I ascertained that she was less than enthused about my handsome gun-sling (patent pending). (I was somewhat amused by her rendition of 'Crazy Coyote Yipping at the Wall'--I think it's a yoga exercise??) But as soon as she could vocalize her comments (this occurred soon after her 'Horse Hyperventilating as it Stamps Out a Fire' yoga routine....), it was clear that she wasn't shooting blanks.

I scampered out of range, reminding her as I zigged and zagged that I had just screwed a TINY hook into her shelf and that I thought the belt and hunter orange string looked rather rakish, not to mention no-cost!

She wasn't amused.

Being the considerate husband, I put the task of figuring out something better on my to-do list. I figured I would get it done about the same time Cindy got the remaining 3 shelves done (they've been gathering dust in the basement since October or so....)

That was Thursday.

Well, today I decided to see what the Internet had to offer in terms of gun displays, and 6-odd hours later, I came up with this:

Here it is from a different angle.

Best thing about it? It didn't cost a cent! I had a piece of scrap that I was able to cut up to just the right sizes!

Sadly, I had all the tools I needed too, so I didn't get to go to Menard's and pick up something handy!

Shootin' from the hip.....

Cindy posted this on Facebook yesterday:

Things you never want to hear your husband say to your 11 year old son..."Do you want me to do the first one, just in case it blows up?"

She forgot to mention Cameron's reply: An enthusiastic 'Yes!!'

This was the conversation we had after we upgraded the ignition system on his potato gun--we now use a fire starter flame instead of a puny spark.

Here is the video....



Yes, I did hit the deer.....(you can hear the 'thwwaappp'-like echo after the initial shot.

Like a surgeon??

On a recent Sunday afternoon Erin joined Cindy and I in the living room, and she sat down and started teasing us--about how we are so jealous of her amazingly good looks, etc. (The self-esteem-building power of a hair straightener is something to behold!)

She went on for a couple minutes (or so it seemed), and I finally acknowledged her existence and responded in monotone, 'Yeah. That's right Erin. Boy am I jealous of you. You hit the nail right on the head.'

She grinned and retorted 'That's right, Dad! You know it! You are soooo jealous! And hey, you are only one surgery away from being JUST LIKE ME!'

Cindy and I almost choked to death--we couldn't stop laughing!

Where does she come up with this stuff?? (Or more accurately, where does she HEAR about this kind of stuff!?)

I'm starting to see why the young women at church think she is such a hoot!

What Better Way to Spend a Snow Day?

Here he is with his trusty 'Spudnik'... or would it be 'Spudinator' or 'Spuddermeister Meisterspudder' or 'Spudulicious' or 'Taternator'? I think the jury is still out....



And here is his first YouTube contribution as a YouTube user. (Notice his 'YouTube Explanatory Voice.' Yes, it has been a busy day for him!



It fired, and according to Cameron it would've taken the nose off of the deer--if it still had a nose....or a head....

Here is a video of the entire process (after ramming a potato down the barrel)....



Now, this can be dangerous, so don't try it at home!

Further proof that Daddo is an enabler.....

Cameron has been obsessing about potato cannons and in one short week he has learned enough on the subject to become an expert.

Case in point: "When I am older and have some money I am going to make a potato gun that uses a Tazer as the ignition source in the combustion chamber. As for propellants, we can start with hairspray, then use car starter fluid, and then try Brut deodorant."

Case in point two: On Saturday we went to a Dollar Tree and purchased 2 butane fire starters (to serve as a cheap ignition system), then dropped by Menard's and picked up the 4" and 2" PVC piping, connectors, and threaded endcaps. Cameron didn't even need a list. We just rummaged around through the bins until we found what he needed. He was rattling off information non-stop "We need 10 inches of 4" pipe for the combustion chamber, then a 4" female threaded connector for the endcap, and a 4"-to-2" connector and then 4 feet of 2" pipe.

An hour after we got home it was all glued together.

2 hours after that we gave it a try. We couldn't get it to work.

We talked with Cameron's married cousin Josh (who grew up reading the book 'Backyard Ballistics' and has made many potato potato cannons, including one fueled by propane, equipped with a pressure gauge, valves and a computer fan to evenly mix the air and propane in the combustion chamber, and ignited by a Tazer. We won't go into what types of pyro activities his dear wife has done during her eventful life....let's just say it included fireballs and visits by the local authorities) and he gave us some pointers, the most important one being to use less fuel than more.

Tonight we went to Kroger's and bought some nice big potatoes and then tried it again, using less starter fluid and protecting the 2 electrodes in the chamber from the spray.

On the 3rd click of the starter, the gun boomed and a potato just barely missed the deer (our archery practice deer--now headless) in the back of the yard.

Cameron was then pumped up on adrenaline, and so we tried it again.

After 2 tries it finally went off again.

I am sure that Cameron is asleep right now dreaming of even better ignition systems.

I wonder what he's going to name his artillery piece?

Big Bertha? Ol' Betsy? Phil?

But but but.......

Last night's dinner conversation:

Daddo (I think): "... All except Mommy, who...."

Ally: "What does 'except' mean?"

Daddo: "It means, all BUT Mommy gets to....."

Ally: "Butt Mommy! Butt Mommy!" [Insert chortles here....]

Sound Judgment Hits at Age 4

A year ago our entire family watched the Lord of the Rings trilogy (extended versions) from the beginning to the 5+different endings. (We used 'Clearplay,' which cut out the especially gory scenes.)
Allyson (age 3.75 at the time) loved it. She especially loved Gollum, and for weeks thereafter would walk around the house saying 'My precioussss! My precioussss!' She watched it all with nary a sign of fear.
So during the current break this year she again expressed great interest in watching it.
So tonight we gave in and put it in. During the prologue she galloped halfway up the stairs 3 times when she thought things might be getting 'scary.' She took especial care to not be in front of the TV when there was an early cameo of Gollum.
In the end, Cindy took her upstairs to watch Toy Story 3.

I always said she was a smart girl!

The jury's still out on her Dad.....

Hmm....maybe she would like The Seven Samurai better...though I think I would get tired of reading the subtitles to her... (I've had the DVD for 8 months now, and I still haven't found the 208 minutes necessary to watch it!)

Touche!

Yesterday Kenner was up in our bedroom watching TV on our bed, where I found her shelling and eating peanuts from her Christmas stocking.
As her bag was getting full of empty shells, she began laying unshelled ones on the new bedspread.
I put a quick stop to that, telling her that I didn't want a lot of salt residue on the new bedspread.

So today I was cutting my toenails and temporarily putting the clippings on the bedspread.

Kenner walked in, did a double-take, and then dryly commented, 'And you were worried about a little salt?!'

And a Merry Christmas to You!

And before I forget....
Merry Christmas from the Dayton Ohio Contingent of the Floyd Clan!

Erin (just turned 14), Cindy (just turns heads), Louis (just a cheapskate), Allyson (4 3/4, just a cutie)
Makenna (9 1/4, just a Daddy's girl), and Cameron (11.5, just lookin' for wabbits to test his hollow-point pellets)

Striking Fear In My Heart

Background:
Nearly 7 months ago the two older girls were frolicking around in the kitchen. Not unusually, one of them lost their balance and fell on the open dishwasher door.
When Mommo and Daddo returned home and found that the dishwasher door now opened far enough to almost hit the floor, they were not pleased.
The next day when the dishwasher was run, water was found seeping out from under it.
More displeasure abounded.
I did a cursory check, but didn't find the root cause.

This was then followed by 7 months of not using the dishwasher. (Mommo had had this idea--later found to be a 'moon-bat crazy idea'-- that this would be a good opportunity to give our kids more hands-on contact with work. Naturally, I agreed with her, and forgot about the dishwasher.)

However, a couple weeks ago Cindy hinted that she wanted to dishwasher back in operation.

She hinted strongly that she would be calling a repairman sometime after Christmas.

While I was still hyperventilating, I managed to pencil in a more comprehensive troubleshooting regimen on my to-do list.

Its turn came up on Christmas Day at about 1 PM. I had pulled out the dishwasher and was running it to see if I could find the source of the leak. (I was guessing it was a cracked frame).

Five minutes after it was started, as I lay on the floor looking for leaks with my flashlight, I got sprayed in the face. There was a tube running along the side of the unit, and I saw that it had been chafed by the hinge and had developed a hole.

5 minutes after that, Plumber's Epoxy (no man's toolkit is complete without it!) and electrician's tape took care of the hole, and then some duct tape was used to keep the tube away from the hinge hardware!

Merry Christmas Cindy! I was so happy to spend five minutes fixing a 7-month-old problem!
(And isn't it a much better gift than a dumb ol' diamond or solid gold gew-gaw?)

Strange Thoughts....

We were invited to go sledding today, and we had a great time (especially Cindy, who got to stay home and wrap, etc.), and at some point the following thoughts and images popped into my mind.

The first was....

"This is why she married me....."




...which was followed by....


"But this is why she keeps me!"




Lucky girl!?

My son's not like me PART 5276.23.3

Yesterday I got a call from an excited Cameron at work.
Obviously talking while high on adrenaline, he related how he had shot his BB gun at a rabbit in our backyard (about 25 yards away), that it had jumped up about 4 feet in the air, and then hobbled away.
He further said that he had followed the blood trail for a ways, and was going back out to try to find it.
Why?
"Because I want to find it, kill it, skin it, and eat it." (I can only hope that the missing phrase "cook it" was just an oversight....)
In a clinical manner he further explained that based on the color of the blood trail it was probably a lung shot or maybe a neck artery shot.
When I got off work, he had me out looking for it on the hill out back (he had already had Erin and her friend out looking). We never found it. There were rather large bloodstains at the places where the rabbit paused along the way. We are guessing that a hawk got it before we did.

Fast forward to this morning, 7 AM.
Cameron calls out to say he feels sick. He is soon bowing at the porcelain throne.
He returns to his room.
He asks me to look out the window and see if I can see any rabbits.
I look out back and see 2 on the walking path between the hills (about 40 yards from the house.)
I stupidly tell him that I see them.
He scampers downstairs.
I look out 2 minutes later.
He is wearing a coat and shorts (there is snow on the ground--it is probably 28 degrees).
He quietly sneaks back to the hunting zone.
He takes a shot from a long distance.
He misses.
He has the sense of mind to come back in.

He says he plans to relieve the entire area of rabbits.
I say that if he does that there won't be anything left to hunt.
He says that he will leave one.
I say that it takes two to make little baby rabbits.
"Not if the one is gay!" he retorts.
I kindly explain that gay rabbits are even less likely to have babies.

Fortunately his stomach starting hurting again, and he is laying on top of one of heating vent in the computer room, with visions of dead rabbits dancing in his head.

Fashion Gal!

This morning when I walked into the kitchen (6:40 AM), Erin was already sitting at the table in the unlit morning room quietly eating her cereal.
As usual she had on a hoodie jacket (She probably has to peel this off her body after a couple weeks of continuous wear....)
Anyway, as she sat there in the partial darkness I could also see that she had on a dark skirt--she never wears one to school unless it's game day and the coach has a figurative gun to her head--so, in an effort to mold future behavior I complimented her on how nice she looked in her skirt.
She gave me a quizzical look, then grinned and replied,"It's not skirt, it's a towel--my jeans are still not dry yet.'

Thank goodness for the subdued lighting!

Disappointments

Well, Cameron's team lost their game today--and Cameron didn't score any goals either. As he drilled 4 the last game it was a bit of a let-down for him. (A welcome lesson in humility in our view....)

Strangely, even though he didn't score a goal today he wanted ice cream after the game. Fortunately we had some leftovers from the night of the previous game, so the kids combined to finish it off.

Yes, three kids in soccer and 1 in JH volleyball.

Yes, holes in our heads.

Yes, we're keeping busy.

Everlasting Gobstopper fingers?

As everyone who sees her knows, Ally loves to hold onto something silky (the object in hand is aptly referred to by her as 'Silky') and pop her right index and middle fingers into her mouth.....(and would it be improper of me to add)....'and she really sucks'??

Anyway, recently we have been asking her what her fingers taste like, and they seem to change flavors on an almost daily basis.

They are often 'chocolate' and other tasty flavors.

Yesterday Cindy asked her the usual question, and she replied, 'Like leaves.'

Cindy commented, 'leaves? But little girls don't eat leaves!'

Allyson replied, 'No, but baby giraffes do. And that's what I am!'

Great. Along with her rotating flavored fingies she also dabbles in shape-shifting!

That would raise the question, if the latter is true, is she a Cylon or a Theilaxu?

Calling Marlin Perkins! Calling Marlin Perkins!

Cindy just called to say that our yard is like 'Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom.'

On Sunday morning Cindy was shedding tears over the impending fate of the big, cute raccoon we trapped in the cornpatch. She was heartbroken over what was going to happen to the coon.

But what a difference a couple days make!

Just 10 minutes ago Cameron came rushing into the house, and blurted to Cindy, 'THERE'S A BLACK SNAKE IN OUR YARD!! CAN I SHOOT IT?'

With nary a hesitation, Cindy replied, 'YES!'

By phone I have just been informed that Cameron, David and 2 BB guns have done the trick. The snake has passed on. Yes, the snake is no more. It has ceased to be. It has expired and gone to meet it's maker. It's a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace. It's kicked the bucket, shuffled off the mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the choir invisible! It is an ex-snake!

(Bonus points for recognizing the source of the above eulogy.)

Maybe Cameron will skin it and put it on his wall like the rattlesnake skin of the snake he and his cousin killed in CA.....??

It ain't an 'ox in the mire' anymore.....

From now on, in our family it will be 'A coon in a trap' whenever something not suitable for the Sabbath must be taken care of on a Sunday.....

The pelt is drying nicely.

Cameron is a grinning fool.

Dad learned that there is more than 1 way to skin a coon (but they are all rather distasteful...especially when doing such out in the corn in 90-degree 90% humidity weather.

A Midsummer's Night Dream

With apologies to 'Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree'


I looked out the window and what did I see?
A raccoon dangling from a snare in the tree!
Summer has brought me such a nice surprise,
A corn-stealing Mama Coon before my eyes!
I could take a BB and make her bleat,
Too bad she slipped away before she was dead meat!
It wasn’t really so, but we wished she’d be,
A coonskin cap on Camerino’s wall-y.

The Sound of Silence

It was time for Ally to say her prayers before bed, and she pleaded to be able to say them 'in her head.'

I said to her, 'But I want to hear!'

She said, 'Just listen!'

She then assumed the position, said her prayer in silence, and finished (a mere 10 seconds later) with a verbal 'Amen.'

'See!' she said proudly.

Yes, I saw, but I found it hard to listen to silence! (I guess I need to study Zen more?)

Show-off!

Tonight as Cindy was in a quandary about what to fix for dinner, I suggested waffles.

Kenner's face lit up, and when I asked Ally she also nodded and grinned ferociously.

Cindy got out the Bisquick, and I opened a couple cupboards in my search for the waffle iron.

Cindy watched for a second, then felt the need to comment.

'It's been TWO YEARS!' she cooed, her tone edged with the finest Damascus steel. Yeah, I guess we have been in the house that long now.

The sarcasm having sharpened my senses, I said, 'Ahh....it is in one of the cupboards with a shelf that pulls out!'

Rolling her eyes, she turned to Ally and sweetly asked, 'Ally, where is the waffle iron?'

Ally beelined to a lower-level cupboard, opened the door, pulled out the shelf and pointed proudly.

Cindy put out her hand and they exchanged a high-five.

This is kinda how Cindy looked at that moment (in terms of facial expressions only....and in the context of "The Karate Kid" final scene.....)



Ah, the proud look of Mr. MiyaGI!

Bear Country

We have enjoyed wonderful sunny weather the past couple days, and our neighborhood is mimicking a community of bears--everyone is coming out of hibernation and wandering around the neighborhood.

Let me be quick to add that, unlike bears, they are looking for conversation and exercise rather than food.

And yes, one of the older neighbors who shall not be named was out at 5 PM in his PJs--but I think he only walked a lap or two around the block.

I guess the above analogy doesn't hold too well under scrutiny because--at least in my case--it is plainly manifest that I spent more time eating than hibernating over the winter!

I found a good likeness of how I feel--gray hairs, pasty pink skin and all!

Drug me!

Ally has had mild fevers and coughing the past 5 days or so (it's mostly coughing right now), and Cindy called me at work to tell me that Ally had woken up at 7:15 and had walked into our bedroom holding a bottle of Motrin in one hand and a spoon in the other.

That girl knows what she wants!

I pity her husband! (Though at least he'll feel wanted too!)

Now that's lucky!

On Saturday night I took Kenner to dinner and a Father-Daughter dance at the school together with our 2-houses-over neighbor Joe and his daughter Kylie.

I got the best of the bargain though. It was the second-to-last dance before I was able to talk Kenner into actually dancing with me (most of the time the dance floor was covered with little girls running in circles and otherwise roving in madcap girlish packs with all the dads being wallflowers).

And then halfway thru the dance she said her stomach was hurting her (my diagnosis was 'Too many treats--she didn't concur), so that ended that!

Still, I had a hard time getting her out of the gym because the last song was Taylor Swift's 'White Horse.' (If it had been Ally, it would've been an impossible task!)

Games Girls Play.....

The other day Ally was busily drawing a picture with her crayons.

Cindy came by and Ally piped out, 'Mom, what color should I use? Red or blue?'

Ally then added in a conspiratorial tone, 'Say red!'

Cindy dutifully answered, 'How about red?'

Ally replied, 'No! I'm already using BLUE!'

[Insert Evil Laugh Here]

I was calling someone tonight to set up an interview--we all know what that means, don't we!--and I walked into the kitchen towards the end of the voicemail message I was leaving.

Being extremely bright, Cindy must've picked up on the gist of the call.

As I turned the phone off she gave me a serious look, and said, 'Hey, you left something out on your message!'

Being not so bright, I replied with concern, "Oh? What?"

'The evil laugh!' she evilly chortled.

I gave her an evil 'Bwah-ha-ha,' which she gave a thumbs-up to, so I guess I'll have to try it out some other time!

The Blog of Revelations???

I see that the last post was number 666 on this blog.
And it just happened to be about being wicked!

I guess it's a good thing I didn't inadvertently work in the number 144,000 anywhere!

Who knows what I might've started!

Wickedness Never was Happiness???

Well, maybe, but from what I've been able to tell, 'Wicked' is sheer delight to the womenfolk in our home.

Cindy and I went to see this stage version of a 'chick flick' a week ago Thursday, and though it was quite enjoyable (despite the fact it stars a green-hued lass named 'Elphaba'--Elpheba???!!!) that was just the start.

Cindy now swoons every time she listens to the CD ("It's just like seeing it again!") and prefers it even to Regis and Kelly in the morning. The girls are enchanted too. And now I find myself unconsciously humming some of the songs.

Still, it does get me out of the obligatory annual 'chick-flick' DVD rental date night that all husbands endure. And if she wants to go see another show (she bought these for us (HA!) for a Christmas present) I can just pop in the CD and let her relive it!

Elphaba????!?!??!?!?

Thatta girl!

Yesterday Allyson called upstairs with the following gem:

"Dad! Makenna is tattle-telling!"

Men's Jewelry

As I was getting Ally ready for bed, she was sorting through some kid jewelry.

'Here Dad,' she said, 'Here's a necklace for you.'

Ah, another teaching moment, I thought.

'Ally,' I gently remonstrated, 'Boys don't wear necklaces--at least, not most boys.'

She replied brightly, 'Frodo wears a necklace! One with a ring on it!'

Touche!

This is what I get for having a Lord of the Rings family movie marathon over Christmas break....(with the Clearplay filter cutting out the more violent frames).

(At least she hasn't had the need to say something like, 'He was twitching because he's got my axe embedded in his central nervous system!')

An afterthought....

Erin had a bball game tonight (they lost in overtime), and Ally and I got home at 7 PM rather than the usual 6:15 PM or so.
Cindy had a harried look as I walked in, and she promptly said, 'You're taking me out tonight!'
5 minutes later we were backing out, and we ended up at Godfather's Pizza.
15 minutes later we were eating a 1/2 Supreme Combo 1/2 Pepperoni pizza. Cindy was in heaven! You see, seven months ago we had first tasted a Supreme Combo on the occasion of a nephew's HS graduation, and she had fallen in love. (Of course we had never gone back, as a large multi-topping pizza costs about $20--and there ain't no coupons!)

30 minutes later as we were pulling out of the parking lot, she gushed, 'That is the best pizza EVER! Oh, Godfather, I love you more than anything!........Well, second only to 'Mr. Darcy.' (See the previous post....)
Then she paused briefly, looked over a me, and continued (having only missed a couple hundred beats, or so it seemed].....'Well, YOU'RE number one, of course!'

I'm glad that is straightened out!

Pride and Preju-GPS

One of Cindy's 'non-surprise' gifts for Christmas (and it's surprising how many of these there were...) was a GPS unit.

As she was fiddling around with the settings, she came across the language settings for the voice, and after trying some of them, she selected 'British English' and as soon as those mellifluous tones began emanating from the speakers, she swooned, murmured something about 'My Mr. Darcy' and her countenance was lit up by a beatific smile.

We gave it its first test-drive on Sunday when we went to Middletown (my nephew is fresh off his mission to Hong Kong and was speaking). As the English voice kindly provided driving instructions Cindy went limp in the passenger seat and said,

'Yes, YES, this is my Mr. Darcy!.....I think I'll take a drive from one end of Huber Heights to the other!' (HH is famous for its maze-like street system, and thus there would be a lot of verbal instructions.)

Sounds like I won't have to buy a Valentine's gift now!

Chuck Norris the Omnipotent??

I don’t know if this is just a local phenomenon or a more widespread disease, but Cameron has recently been hearing, finding, and memorizing Chuck Norris jokes.

Here is a sampling:

The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure--Chuck Norris goes killing.
Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.
Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry--the man ate a Jeep!

And my personal favorite:
Chuck Norris was originally offered the role as Frodo in Lord of the Rings. He declined because, "Only a wimp would need three movies to destroy a piece of jewelry."

Now, he has never seen a Chuck Norris movie (those Golan-Globus low-budget shoot-em-up chop-em-down blow-them-up flicks) or any of the TV shows. He probably doesn’t even know what he looks like. So for others in the same situation....




I got online yesterday and found a 100-joke list for him to use. (Of course, it was only 80 jokes after I got rid of the adult-themed ones, and then I had to tastefully edit the filthy-foul language out of some of the other ones). After that experience, I forbade him to get on the Internet and look up more jokes by himself.

Thanksgiving 2009

A time of great feasting and......and......and more feasting at my sister's home!

The Prep Work--Looks like there was some HAM along with those turkeys!

The Spread....it makes the Cartwright's Ponderosa spread look downright puny!

The gracious hosts.

The thankful and hungry Pilgrims

More HAM at the dinner table!

The pie table. Somewhat disappointing, I may add, as there were only 8 pies for 6 adults and 7 kids. Oink oink!

Makenna the Hippie

Allyson getting her daily dose of horse.

To not upset the sensibilities of sensitive readers, no photos of people groaning as they are supporting their distended stomachs have been included.

I went, I spent, I came home

I had hoped to get out of going this year, but as luck would have it, I was 20th in line at Sam's Club at 4:15 AM.

Cindy had gotten up at 3:15 in preparation for her yearly masochistic ritual, but I got to sleep in until 3:45!

And I got a free breakfast out of it too! I just brought it all home so that I could eat it after the sun comes up!

Turkey Day Smells

Yesterday Cindy and I went for a nice 4-mile walk late in the morning.

Just before we left I put the cold-smoked turkey in the oven, so as we were leaving I cheerily proclaimed, "By the time we get back that turkey should be smelling REAL good!"

Cindy cheerily added, "When we get back, we should certainly be able to smell YOU real good!"

What's to argue???

Has She Been Listening to the Commodores?

Yesterday we were talking about funerals, etc., and Cindy was telling how she gets teary-eyed and emotional at them.

Erin listened, then commented, 'I keep my feelings inside,' tapping her chest.

"Yes," she continued with some degree of satisfaction, "Right here in my brick house!"

Tradition! Tradition!

Mid-day yesterday was kinda slow at the homestead, so Cindy looked at me and said, "I know you like to put up the Christmas tree on Black Friday while I'm gone, but why don't we just put it up today!"

I obligingly replied, "Ha! There is NO way! That is the only thing that helps me maintain some degree of sanity in the home while you are gone all day!"

This from the lady who thrives on traditions in a way that would make Tevye hang his bearded head in shame--always having the birthday person sit in the "Birthday Chair," having "Monkey Bread" for Christmas always eating babyback ribs for Christmas dinner, singing "Long Live the Salsa" at birthdays, etc., etc. (Yeah, I will pay big time for that last one....)

Anyway, I am glad I was able maintain this one tradition that I hold dear.

On a final note, Erin was listening nearby, her mouth agape.

"But Dad!" she stuttered in disbelief,"You NEVER tell Mom 'No'!"

I guess in the survival of the fittest, some traditions just don't have the requisite staying power!

Well, THAT was short-lived!

I now have Cambone crouched over the heating vent in the study, and Ally on my lap.

Thanksgiving Morning....

Well, I must say that things are going swimmingly this morning! The sandwich turkey (i.e., the turkey to be used primarily for sandwiches after the big feast) is outside in the smoker, and Cindy has rolls in the frig, 3 pies on the counter, and the 16-layer jello dessert (or is it a side dish?) already made.

And, oh yes....the kids are all still asleep!

Yes, that is just one of the many things to be thankful for!

Howling at the New Moon.....

Yesterday the kids were out of school, and Erin was bored (gee, what a rare occurrence!)

However, some time ago Erin had gotten a pass to get into a movie for free, so Cindy offered to take her to the latest Twilight movie (I don't recall what the name of this installment is....'Day of the Living Trixie 2'? 'Yawn 2'? '10 Stupid Things Girls Choose to Do 2?'?)

ANYway, Erin wanted to walk around the block last night, so as we walked I asked her about the movie. She was still swooning.

She first explained the intricacies of the love story between the two characters, then she commented favorably (a bit TOO favorably in my opinion) about the leading man's "8-pack" (I guess vampires have abnormal abdominal muscle structures??), and then explained the 'cliff-hanger' ending (at least if you had never read the next book....)

Here was my favorite part of the conversation (aside from the part where we stopped talking about the movie....):

Erin: So anyway, there was the boy named Jacob, and he...
Dad (interrupting): What is Jacob? A vampire? A werewolf?
Erin: A freakin' HOT werewolf!! Bow-wow!!

(OK, maybe I added the 'Bow-wow' part!)

Fortunately she only wanted to walk around the block once.

Family Proclamation Week--Days 3 and 4

I think the Family Proclamation Week is having some effect.

There are the telltale nervous tics, the trembling hands, the incoherent babblings, and the cowering in fear and loathing.

The kids, on the other hand, seem unaffected.

Yep, Cindy and I are suffering from the symptoms of Post-(or is that 'Mid-'?) Traumatic Stress Disorder.

Tuesday night: It started off well enough, and ended up well enough, too--it was just that in-between of a couple hours that was unnerving.

Highlight: We got the 3 pinata sections paper-mached together with minimal problems.



Yes, what a happy family are we!

As to what happened after that, I don't recall right now what instigated it (though I have a good guess as to the 'who'), but one of the kids got to spend some quality time in their bedroom, and it was only with great intestinal fortitude that we let the monster--bless their heart--out to watch a movie together.
Amazingly, there was not a single problem during the entire movie. Except, perhaps, for my eyes. Partway thru my eyelids seemed to close on their own accord. I think it was due to the fact that I had been rolling my eyes in agony during the first part of the movie, perhaps the dumbest movie ever made. Nope, not Nacho Libre, nope, not about vampires and the girls they love, and nope, not a Barbie movie. Cindy had been to the dollar store to get crepe paper for the pinata, and she found a DVD for the same price. It was called Super Dave (you may recall this stuntman character from old SNLs). Anyway, a dollar was WAY too much. As Cindy said, at least we now have a GREAT white elephant gift!

And as Cindy as commented, 'Yes, our family seems to get along the best when we are all interacting with the TV rather than each other!'

Well put!

Wednesday: Ahh, this night made last night seem like a picnic!

Over the course of 2 hours, the crepe paper was applied to the pinata. All the kids helped--for at least 3 minutes each--but Ally kept at it (her fingers flew like magic as she spread the glue!), and Erin and Cameron did cut the crepe paper at times....





Then more kids sent to their rooms, dessert privileges were lost, and then while the rest of the family watched The Biggest Loser retrospective show, I fell asleep while reading a book. I woke up just in time to help get kids in bed. Then I fell back asleep again. Cindy will have to fill in the blanks (or the blankety-blanks....or blankety-blankety blanks....)

Crotchety Kids--PART II

Family Proclamation Week: Night 2

Unfortunately, tonight was more of a horror film than a Disney pic.

Kids were in bad moods with bad attitudes (let your imaginations run wild! Sorry, not wild enough!), which put the parents in bad moods, and it devolved steadily from there.
However, there were bits of sunshine peeking thru the dark and fell mists of despondency.
For the first time in 4+ years we updated our 72-hour kits and then Cindy had the great idea of putting them in an easy-to-access location!



And then I opened one of the 3600-calorie energy bars that had gone past the due date, and we all found it still quite edible. Kinda like a lemony cookie without a lot of sugar...(Cindy was the only one who didn't try it. She was chewing gum at the time. She didn't seem too dejected about missing this delectable dainty!)



Then Erin frosted a cake for dessert. At least the kids had a good attitude about this part of the evening!



We parents enjoyed this part too, as the deal was that if they got cake they would then go to their rooms for quiet time the rest of the night (it was only 8 PM).

Of course, it didn't quite work out that way. I had to help Erin study for a Social Studies test she 'remembered' at 7:45 PM, and the kids were less than quiet in their rooms.

Well, today is another day. Will it be good? Will it be bad? Will we survive? Stay tuned?
(At least I take some comfort in the fact that if the kids were ever to decide to leave home (or were kicked out) they would now have easy access to their 72-hour backpacks! Heck, I would probably let them take the tent too!)

Crotchety Kids--PART I

A week ago Saturday, Erin attended a Beehive activity where they learned how to do some basic crocheting.
Erin came home knowing one crochet 'move' (stitch?), and she spent much of the day working on it. By bedtime she had completed a 30-foot length.
Her problem came when she stated that she was going to make one long enough to reach from her bedroom upstairs to the couch in the living room downstairs.
The problem was that she said this in front of Cameron (aka Mr. "I love to compete and WIN!')
Soon he had a crochet implement-thingy (needle?) and a ball of yarn and got busy! For a couple days it was very quiet in the house, as Makenna also joined in the fun.
One day I went down in the basement, and there was Cameron sitting on the loveseat, busily crocheting as he watched TV. Always the inventive one, in order to get just the right amount of tension on the yarn coming from the supply, he had threaded (yarned?) it between a couple toes. (Sadly, I missed getting a picture of this....) He was quite a sight!
I now wonder what he would come up with if Erin got ever got a spinning wheel....he could probably manage to do the same thing just utilizing his body in imaginative ways....
Anyway, Cameron ended up with the longer crocheted length. Once he beat Erin definitively, he pretty much stopped. Erin had already stopped. Makenna had also started, done 10 feet or so, and then stopped.

Family Proclamation Week

Tonight was the first night of our "Family Proclamation Week". Last week for family home evening we planned out several things we wanted to do as a family this week. I won't tell you all the things we planned to do (for fear we don't do them) but will share what we do end up doing.

We each get to take a turn having our favorite dinner. Tonight was my choice, Chicken Alfredo Pizza. While it is not my "favorite" it was what we had and I could use leftovers to make something tasty. That always makes me happy. The kids all helped by rolling the dough, grating cheese, cutting the chicken, setting the table etc. Even Ally helped by putting napkins at every place setting. Before dinner I set some candles on the table so we could eat by candlelight. We did this a few weeks ago and the kids loved it. I loved it too because it seemed like dinner was much more calm and peaceful. Anyway...so as we sat by candlelight I read some paragraphs from the booklet on Families given out by our church. We talked about how families are the most important social group we belong to. We should love and help one another etc... It was nice. Then we ate.

After dinner was the most anticipated activity of probably the whole week.

We are making a Pinata.

Call us crazy but we thought it might be fun.

It will involve several nights and will culminate at the end of the week. The plan is to make it a Snowman Pinata. We will see.

Makenna got to choose a dessert tonight. She wanted Pudding Cake. It is her favorite. She made it with minimal help from me and served everybody.

The evening was a mostly fun one. I am looking forward to the rest of the week and lots of great memories for our family.

Win Some, Lose Some....

So today is the day Erin has been waiting for ever since she was born--it gives validation to her life, and brings a smile to her face (a rather saucy, triumphant smile anyway...

Yes, she is now officially 5'11.5", which puts her a full half-inch above my height.

She is basking--nay, even reveling--in her new-found glory.

During church today she looked over at me, and gestured to her, then to me, then spread her hands vertically to express the concept of 'Yo, Daddy! I am taller.'

I can well imagine what comes next out of her fertile mind--Nicknames.
Perhaps, 'Smallo' or 'Mini-Man' or maybe even 'Little One.' (Sorry Alise--that may now be my nickname too!)

So I lost one.

On the up side, Cameron has been on an origami kick for a couple weeks, and can whip out cranes and other birdlife. One day I had the bad idea of showing him some of the miniature ones I had saved from my mission days.

Needless to say, that put him on a new mission--to out-mini me! Well, today during church he made a pretty small one, so tonight I displayed my masterpieces again next to his:



(Ahem....Mine are on the LEFT....)

I helpfully commented that he had made a fine mommy-crane that nicely complemented my newborn cranes.

Speaking of media influences....

Before our recent trip to the Smoky Mountains, we bought a DS game for the kids that contains about 20 different little game (TouchMaster2).

Sadly, at the time we didn't realize how addicting it could be!

Yes, Cindy will play one of the games (DICE KING) for hours! (And the kids like to play it too....when they get a chance.)

And now look who is playing some of the games!



Oh, the humanity!



Just don't ask Cindy who beat her DICE KING high score yesterday by approximately a factor of 2!

Angels singing off key.....

That's what a missionary said a number of years ago, referring to our kids when they were being rather obnoxious at the dinner table.

Cindy and I chuckle about that missionary from time to time--we're sure he knows better now!

Anyway, here are some of the latest from the kids:

1. Kenner pulled out a card that read, 'What do you like best about your Mom?' She loudly answered, 'She has a big nose!' She then chortled uncontrollably.

Knowing that she loves her dad, I asked sweetly, "What do you like best about your DAD?"
She pig-snorted as she adroitly replied, 'You have a big belly that jiggles like jelly!'

2. Cameron was telling me something about something, and I gave a small chuckle. Erin was watching and commented, 'When Dad tries not to laugh he always rubs the hair on the back of his head!' A second later she added, 'Such hair as there is, anyway.'

I never exaggerate....much.....

I posted a couple things about Ally recently, but the proof is in the pudding!

For your viewing pleasure:

1. Ally the Horse 'ripping bark off trees with her whinny.'

TURN UP THE SOUND--if you dare.....(And just know that she is somewhat camera-shy, so she wasn't nearly as loud as she can be....)



2. Ally singing Taylor Swift's "White Horse" (Again, she is not belting it out like she usually does, but you'll get the idea.....)

Guess that Movie!

Having a Clearplay DVD player (one that allows you to edit out the bad language, scenes, etc.) is certainly an aid to education!

Of course, some educators do not consider rote memorization to be actual learning, but I beg to differ.

I finally watched a movie that Cindy had bought for me a year or 2 ago, and since we have the 'Filthy Filter' I watched it with Cameron in the room.

Having since watched it a couple more times, Cameron now has some of the lines down pat!

"I feel happy! I feel happy!"

"It's merely a flesh wound!"

"You and your stupid English kaaaaaniggits!"

"She turned me into a newt!"

"But what also floats in water?"
"Bread!"
"Apples!"
"Very small rocks!"

"If she weighs the same as a duck then......she's a witch!!!!"


And yes, his favorite scene was the duel between King Arthur and the Black Knight!
However, it is not very family-friendly, so I present his 2nd-favorite scene (no bad language, no other objectionable content)

......BURN HER! BURN HER!



Yes, I think I will regret this education of Cameron in the long run.....

Since Christmas music is already on the radio....

Twas 6 weeks before Christmas,
And here in the house,
Some young'uns were readying
For bed though they groused.

Kenner was reading
A story with care,
Rapt in attention
Was Ally's sweet stare.....



When what to my wondering
Eye did appear?
But an ad hoc boutique
And our Camerina dear!



With hair gussied up
In Pippi-ish locks,
He even posed for us
With an 'Uncle Rico* shot!'
(*Napoleon Dynamite inside joke....)



And after the fun
We welcomed Duran-Duran,
Or maybe Bryan Adams?
Or was it just a madam?



And I heard someone say
As they fled out of sight,
Thar's just sum'tin not right
About the Floyd house tonite!

Great insight!

This is a conversation I just had with Allyson.

Allly (whimpering): Mom, I just hit my head.

Me: Oh no! I bet it hurts.

Ally (whimpering): I hit it on the back of the couch. It hurts very bad.

Me: Where is it?

*Ally jumps off my lap while I am trying to kiss the terrible owie. Apparently she has a great idea.

Ally (with a sly smile on her face): Maybe some of my Halloween candy will make it better?

Me (thinking she is a genius): I am sure it will.

It did.

Horse Sense

When I was in elementary school—primarily in the 1st~4th grades—there was this girl who was batty about horses. She talked about horses, drew pictures of horses, and if I remember correctly, even had a horse-themed lunchbox! And while me and my friends were out playing war, me leading my squad in action against the nefarious enemy led by a boy I called ‘Squinty-Eyes,’ killing each other in dramatic fashion with our trusty forefingers, this girl and her group of friends (fillies?) would be prancing around the playground like horses, making whinnying sounds, pawing in the dirt, and otherwise looking silly. As this was pre-Monty Python and the Holy Grail, all they were missing was Patsy to go behind them banging coconuts together to make hoof noises.
But I digress…..
Naturally, Joyce and I didn’t get along too well either. I’m not sure why, as it is not as if our fingers could kill their imaginary horses, though we often tried to drill their pretty (or so I imagine) ponies between the eyes as they blithely pranced through our kill zones. Had I been more clever at the time, I could have made some witty comment, like, ‘Oh, poor horsey! It looks like it’s getting a bad case of lead poisoning! BANG BANG! Haha!’ But as clever was an adjective that was rarely used when referring to me, I am sure I just crassly yelled out, ‘BANG! Your horse is D-E-A-D! Hahahahahahahhahahahahaha!’
And I will add that a decade later I happened to be back in that town, and what did I espy in the newspaper? A picture of Joyce, sitting pertly on a horse, basking in the limelight as Walla Walla’s newly crowned rodeo queen! Which just goes to show you that even crazy people can sometimes succeed in reaching their dreams!

So anyway, I told you the above to help you understand the below…..

You see, Ally makes Joyce appear positively sane by comparison.
Ally has been on this horse kick (no pun intended) for at least a month now. And it’s only getting worse. There is this cartoon on TV called Horseland, and, sadly, Cindy has been able to get DVDs of it from the library. And I ask you, how many times can a little girl watch the same DVD without tiring of it? Answer: I’ll let you know—at this time I only know that 20 times is not enough. (It only takes 2 showing to drive a Daddy to thoughts of self-immolation…)
She also goes around on all fours as much as possible.
And she has developed a whinny that can rip bark off of trees.
Fortunately, she is a house-trained. When she walks up to me with her legs assuming the ‘I gotta go to the bathroom real bad’ position and asks for assistance, once I try to hurry to the bathroom before the dam breaks, she then plops down on her hands and knees and s-l-o-w-l-y canters towards the bathroom, as if she doesn’t have a care in the world. Good taste prohibits me from mentioning the similarities between her and horses found in their respective bathroom behaviors. Let’s just say that when we were in the Smoky Mountains and she was on a horse carriage ride and the horse did both a #1 and #2 literally right before her eyes, she was enthralled. Way TOO enthralled! And she had Cindy take a ton of pictures of all the horsies in their stalls.


It’s amazing how long a blog post can be when one is sitting the backseat of a car during a business trip with nothing better to do!

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale.....

When I got home yesterday, Cindy was busy making cinnamon rolls, and she mentioned that she had put in a Taylor Swift CD but that the CD wasn’t playing. She ran off to the store soon thereafter, and I messed with the CD player and got it working again. The result of this was that Taylor Swift music was playing when Erin walked into the room.

“Ahh,” she said, fluttering her eyes and flashing a mischievous grin, “Daddy’s in love with Taylor Swift! Just wait until I tell Mom!! It will devastate her!”

I sighed, and gently corrected her, ‘In your own little fairy tale mind!’

She retorted, “In your fairy tale she is Goldilocks!”

Yep, sometimes she comes up with some good ones!

As an aside, Allyson loves TS, and especially ‘White Horse.’ She often sits in front of the CD player and plays it over and over again, singing along as well as she can.

And hey, truth be known, I sometimes listen to her CDs at work while I’m working on a long translation.

If you're happy and you know it.....

Good Mood Gig from SAM-e\



My friend, Kate, over at the clean plate club, needs help. She is trying to win the job of blog writer at the Good Mood Gig Talent Search. Please click on the above link and vote for her. Then go check out her blog to see her two adorable kids, the yummy food she cooks and the super cute crafts she makes. But VOTE first....then again tomorrow...then again the next day....until October 31st.. Thanks.

Be wary....very wary

6 months ago I purchased a book at the Library Book Sale. Library book sales are great because you can get books "cheap". Paperbacks are usually 50 cents and hardbacks $1. We take our carry-on suitcases and load them up with books for us and the kids. Louis and I look forward to going every time they have one. Last April, at the sale, I picked out
"The Emancipator's Wife" A Novel of Mary Todd Lincoln.
I started it about 1 month ago. While it was interesting it took some time to "develop" the story and it wasn't until almost page 200 that Mr. Lincoln and Mary Todd actually met. From then on it has been much more interesting.
Well...yesterday evening I pulled out my book to spend some time immersed in the life of Mr. Lincoln and Mary. Although it was only 9:30 and I wanted to continue to read I didn't. This is the page I stopped on.

WHY DID I STOP HERE YOU'RE WONDERING......

BECAUSE THIS WAS THE NEXT PAGE

This entire section of the book....pages 243 -274...are in the book twice. I wouldn't mind so much if only the pages 323-355 were in the book once! That's right. I am completely missing 32 pages of my book. No wonder the library was selling it.
Today there is another library book sale. I won't be going. I will instead write a letter to the publisher to see if I can somehow get the 32 pages I need.

A Useful Household Fact

Useful Household Fact:
Towels wrapped around one’s head (hair) just slide off when the hair is still thickly slathered with silky conditioner.

Scope of Application:
The above handy hint is for the benefit of housewives who are found in a situation where the house water supply is suddenly cut off right after they have generously massaged copious amounts of conditioner into their rich luxuriant hair while taking a shower.

Real-Life Examples:
This morning. At our house. It appears that the water was only off for a minute or so, but Cindy didn’t find that out until she had called me and then called a neighbor.
She provided the above useful household fact when she called me back to say that the water was back on.
She told me, paused slightly, and then continued, ‘Not that it would apply in your case, of course....’

POSTNOTE: On a related note, as I was giving myself a haircut on the patio on Saturday, Kenner stuck her head out the door and loudly opined, ‘A haircut? That is the LAST thing you should be doing! You need to get MORE hair, not CUT it!’

A Sister's Intercession

A number of weeks ago, some of you may have espied Cameron at church, wearing--of all things--a suit, a tie, and a white shirt. (A pristine hand-me-down from my sister's son's wardrobe.)

He looked really spiffy!

Later during the block meeting Cindy told me that she had tried to get Cameron to wear the suit and a white shirt, but that her charms had been de-spellified, and that it was only through the auspices of Erin that he finally did it. Erin, she explained, had somehow begged, pleaded, and cajoled, and had finally got him to buy into the idea.

It was later that day that I found that it was just the opposite.
Erin had 'bought into' the idea, resorting to a bribe of $10 bucks to get him even wear the scratchy-on-his-soft-neck white shirt.

Cameron's money-loving heart was touched by this sisterly sacrifice. However, he has not worn it since, as there have been no further offers tendered.

Two little gifts from heaven.....

Nope, not twins.
Hate to dash your hopes!

One night last week Cameron tutored Makenna in how to play soccer better. He showed her how to kick hard at a goal and how to follow up on her kicks. The whole time he was nice to her and a perfect gentleman.

That was Gift #1.

Kenner had a game on Saturday, and though she begged Cameron to come watch her so he could see if his one-on-one coaching reaped any dividends. He didn't want to, so I stayed home to work on my backyard "Big Rocks Around A New Big Flowerbed Project," but 20 minutes later he came out complaining that he was bored, so I cajoled him into coming with me to catch the second half of Kenner's game.

When we got there, Kenner was playing goalie.

She saw me, grinned hugely, and waved, saying, 'Guess what Dad! I scored 4 goals!'

I guess she got confused and thought she was bowling!?

That was Gift #2, which was a direct result of Gift #1.

Of course, I would love to relate that Cam and Kenner have maintained this close relationship of mutual respect and love since then, but as in most things in life, what I would like and what is reality rarely converge.

Good grief food???

So yesterday I was telling Cindy that due to my lack of exercise, I would probably keel over with a heart attack sometime soon.

She absorbed this, and then commented, 'Well, all that would do would give me a ton of insurance money that I would end up spending on 'grief food!'

Yep, she's always focusing on the negative! =)

Another Milestone

This past Saturday was a special day in our family. Makenna, was baptized.

She was so excited and happy. She is a genuinely happy girl and brightens our home with her laughter, giggles and smiles. We are so proud of her.

We were fortunate to have family here for the occasion. My brother, Mike, and nephew, Josh, flew in from WA. Now it would be nice to say they came specifically for Makenna's baptism but that would not be true. It just happened to be a coincidence. You see....he is OSU alumni and therefore eligible to win tickets to a game through a lottery (follow that...?). He won and was assigned to Saturday's big game. (By the way...OSU lost in the last 2 minutes of the game. Bummer.) They are big fans...notice the jerseys?

Here we are hanging out after the baptism with our great family.

Just try to get Josh and Cameron to give a "normal" smile to the camera. Impossible!

Allyson hugging on Hunter, her second cousin. I think she has watched too many princess movies. Flash forward 11 years to Stake dances...I think we are in trouble!

We were also able to celebrate Mike's birthday.

It was a great weekend.

Black-Bottom Coconut Bars

This is my first time doing the Cookie Carnival. I like baking so this seems like a match made in heaven.

I am basically the only one in my family who likes coconut. Louis may like it....I'm not sure. Either way though, I will be eating way too many of these delicious treats. I made them this morning and already have eaten 4! It is only 2:30 in the afternoon. I am in trouble.

If you want to try them here is the recipe.

The first day of school....

The kids had a nice, easy first day of school yesterday.
Cindy, on the other hand, was up at 6 AM with Erin (her bus comes by at 7 AM), got the other 2 kids ready (Cameron, who woke up at 7:30, was pretty miffed that we didn’t wake him up early so he could play on the computer), and then she spent 7+ hours basically cleaning the house from top to bottom and also canning 11 quarts of tomatoes. (Ally and her neighbor friend shuttled back and forth between their respective houses during much of this time.)
Things really picked up in the afternoon:
At 3:15 Erin called to say she had forgotten her volleyball practice clothes, so Cindy had to wait for the younger kids to get home (Ally was napping) so she could take her clothes.
I got home at 4:15 and hurriedly put together another batch of salsa (Cindy had scalded, skinned, and chopped up the tomatoes earlier that day.)
Cindy left at 5:20 to pick up Erin from practice.
At 5:50 I took Kenner to a soccer game, where I spent most of the game watching Ally and the same friend (the coach’s daughter) play. Kenner’s team won.
At 6:20 Cindy took Erin had an open house/orientation at the JH.
After the game I finished hot-water bathing Cindy’s tomatoes and pressure-cooking the salsa, cleaning up the kitchen as I went.
Cindy and Erin got home at 8:30, and Cindy enjoyed some leftover chocolate birthday cake and ice cream as her only dinner.
We got the younger kids bathed and into bed, then Cindy spent over an hour helping Erin organize all her binders, folders, notebooks, pencils, pens, and other learning paraphernalia.
I finished cleaning up the kitchen, brought all the bikes and scooters into the garage, pulled the Prizm into the garage, swept the kitchen floor, and then went upstairs to fold some laundry that Cindy had found time to do earlier in the day.
We both collapsed at about 10:30.
And it starts again today.......

An ‘80s Moment

With the demise of Michael Jackson, Cameron was introduced to Weird Al and his Michael Jackson spoofs at a relative's house. I must admit that I was an enabler after that, helping all the kids access the YouTube videos. Anyway that was awhile ago.

So this morning Cindy is in the computer room with Ally, who was in a rather daffy mood.
Out of the blue, Ally pokes her butt out at Cindy and shakes it, singing, ‘My butt is wide...’ (I guess she hasn’t memorized the rest of the lyrics--thank goodness for small miracles!)
(To understand the context, go to YouTube and search for “Weird Al Fat” to see his spoof of MJ’s ‘Bad.’ In terms of pop culture, it is a work of genius--esp. if you’ve seen MJ’s original (also on YouTube).)

As an aside, both Ally and Makenna still spontaneously break out singing, ‘Like a Surgeon.....making a cut for the very first time.’ (Another Weird Al spoof of a Madonna song--which explains his poses towards the end of the video....)

The kids all like his song‘I Won on Ebay' too.

DISCLAIMER: Please view responsibly. The Floyd Family shall be held blameless for any psychological damage resulting from the viewing of such videos (though they are clean) or for children singing the songs in improper venues, such as 'Don't you call me pudgy, portly or stout, let me tell you once again, who's fat!'

Name that smell!

The hot and humid summer days and nights finally arrived 10 days ago, and it has finally spurred the tomatoes in the garden to start turning red in usable quantities.
On Wednesday night, I made a big batch of salsa for canning, and Cindy took the rest of the tomatoes and filled 6 quart jars.

All the kids love to eat my salsa, and I thought they would be overjoyed, but once again they have wronged me, grinding me under their heels. (Isn’t there a scripture warning kids about the evils of doing just that?)

As Cindy related, ‘I was upstairs with Kenner and Ally and they asked, ‘What is that smell?’ I told them that it was the smell of Daddy’s salsa. Sweet Allyson, who is only three, retorted, ‘Nuh-uh! It’s a fart!’

Personally, I’ve never smelled any variety of such emanations (including those invidious SBDs) that smelled like a delicious combination of fresh tomatoes, onions, garlic, and green & jalapeno peppers, but then again....